


The First Words I Ever Said

by Hawkerin



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bad Wolf, F/M, Fluff, Multi-Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-08 00:20:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21226667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkerin/pseuds/Hawkerin
Summary: The words first appeared on his skin after looking into the Untempered Schism.  The first words his soulmate would ever say to him.  But they are in an alien language, so what does that mean for their future?





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing this kind of AU, so I hope it doesn't suck. Both of their personalities are a little bit different due to the soulmarks thing... you'll see. Please comment and stuff.

Young Theta Sigma had looked into the Untempered Schism just a few days ago. He was lucky that he had been selected to attend the Academy. While he was a member of a well respected family line, he had been basically rejected by his cousins and largely ignored by most of his family. He was excited to be able to get away from them all and move into the dormitory at the school, perhaps even meet some new friends there.

What had him even more excited though, was that just a day after looking into the Schism, a soulmark had appeared on his arm. They were rare among his people. Most Time Lords married for political gain, not for romance or love. But there it was on his skin, clear as day. He couldn’t understand the markings, but he would one day.

Next week, he would start at the Academy, and he’d have access to the libraries. Surely he could find out what language this was in the extensive databanks of the Academy and unravel the mystery of who his soulmate was. It was disheartening that she would speak a language other than Gallifreyan, because it meant that he wouldn’t meet her until he could leave the planet and that could be decades, but in a race that could live for millennia that was more than likely. He would have to learn to be patient.

He spent weeks searching the library databanks before he finally found characters that matched the shapes on his arm, then he had to find a language written in that alphabet that matched the words before he could translate it. The phrase didn’t make much sense, but he had heard that was common with soulmarks. The words would be the first thing that your soulmate said to you, so depending on the circumstances of your meeting, they could be anything from ‘hello, my name is…’ to ‘watch where you’re going.’ Theta wasn’t quite sure though what to think of the circumstances when his soulmate would say, “You pulled his arm off.”

Deciding that there wasn’t much point in focusing on that, he instead learned all he could about humans and the planet Earth. The language was English. And while there were many places on Earth where they spoke English, he decided to study England for now, since that was where the language originated. Humans were a species that only lived for a century or so, often less, but they were brilliant, passionate creatures, who would spread out over the entire universe throughout the course of history. And his soulmate was likely one of them.

He did his best at the Academy, but was easily distracted and often disagreed with his teachers on certain questions of morality. He kept his sights set on leaving Gallifrey though. He just had to get assigned to the Research Expedition program and he would be off to explore all of time and space. He couldn’t quite understand where he went wrong however, when he failed his TT Capsule flight test and ended up with a boring desk job for the next few centuries.

Something had gone terribly wrong. He was supposed to be searching for his soulmate and since aliens weren’t allowed on Gallifrey, she couldn’t be here. He was nearing 400 years old now and was still miserably stuck. The whole situation had made him insufferably grumpy and physically aged far more quickly than he should have been in his first incarnation.

While on his way home, he was startled from his melancholy thoughts by a young girl grabbing his arm and pulling him off of the main walkway into the nearby park. The girl brought him to a bench in the shade, surrounded by flowers and sat down. She didn’t say a word to him until he finally sighed and sat next to her.

“What is the meaning of this?” he demanded.

She smiled at him, her dark eyes sparkling with a fondness he didn’t understand. The girl was very young, couldn’t even have finished her schooling, and had dark hair, cut short which was very unusual for the ladies of Gallifrey.

“I’m your granddaughter,” she told him bluntly.

“But,” he protested. “But that’s impossible. You cannot be on Gallifrey outside of your timeline and I have no children, let alone grandchildren.”

“I know. I am technically out of time, but this is how you remember things happening. This has to happen. So, as much as I will miss my parents and the version of you and grandmother from my own time, I must be here with you now or none of that will turn out the way it should,” she explained.

“I will find her?” he asked, unconsciously touching his arm where the soulmark was hidden beneath his sleeve.

She smiled again and assured him, “Of course you will, grandfather.”

“What is her name? What is your name? How can I get to her?” he pleaded.

“Slow down. You know I can’t tell you how to find her. As for her name and mine, they are the same. I am Arkytior,” she said.

“That can’t be. The words are in English, she cannot have a Gallifreyan name,” he argued.

“Oh alright, it’s a translation,” Arkytior admitted. “But I couldn’t very well show up on Gallifrey with a human name, now could I?” 

He looked her over again, she was being honest about everything, he was sure. He could feel her telepathic presence just on the edges of his mental shields. He was certain that she was family, even if he hadn’t ever felt a loving telepathic touch from any of his family so far on Gallifrey. 

“But why are you here? It can’t just be to tease me with the name of the one I am destined to find.”

“Of course not, Grandfather. I’m here to help you find your TARDIS and travel with you for a while,” she explained.

“My TARDIS? What is a TARDIS?”

She laughed then and explained, “Time and Relative Dimensions in Space. It’s what you call your TT Capsule. I think that’s what you said they used to be called. Everyone will call them TARDISes before too long.”

“They won’t let me have one, I’m not even permitted to fly one after failing my test at the Academy,” he told her.

“I know. The Old Girl wouldn’t let you fly her if you had passed it. She flies herself where she wants to go more often than not, but we aren’t asking the Council for one. Come on,” she said, offering her hand to lead him off somewhere else.

It was highly unusual to have as much physical contact as Arkytior had been initiating with him. This was a race of touch telepaths and holding hands or even grasping someone’s arm the way she had earlier was considered far too personal. Then again, if she wasn’t entirely Gallifreyan, perhaps those things were considered normal for humans.

“Are your genetics more Gallifreyan or human? Or is there another species mixed in your parentage?” he questioned as she pulled him towards the yard filled with decommissioned ships.

“You shouldn’t be asking me these things, you know.”

“If you’ll be travelling with me, I will need to be responsible for taking care of you, young lady,” he insisted.

“Gallifreyan genetics are dominant,” she answered with a resigned sigh. “There won’t be any sign of mixing species in my genes.”

“I don’t see how it’s possible that you won’t end up damaging the web of time with future information by being with me now,” he told her, frustrated that she wouldn’t answer all of his questions, yet proud of her for knowing how much was safe to tell him.

“You told me before you sent me here, that we simply need to focus on now. Not on my past or your future, just on getting you away from Gallifrey and out into the universe together. I can’t risk telling you too much or it will all fall apart. It’s exhausting right now, keeping so much focus on my time senses just to know what is safe to tell you.”

“I’m terribly sorry, my dear. I’ll try to do as you suggest and focus on now. But I am a curious soul and it is extremely difficult not to beg you for everything you can tell me about my future,” Theta admitted.

“I know. Curiosity is a family trait,” she said with a smirk. “But for now let’s focus on finding your TARDIS.”

Arkytior pulled him through the rows of decommissioned time ships before stopping and listening intently to a few of them. She smiled brightly when she seemed to find the one she was looking for.

“How will we get inside?” he wondered.

Arkytior pulled on the chain around her neck to reveal a small silver key that had been concealed beneath the tunic she was wearing. He looked at it curiously. It didn’t look anything like the usual keys that were used on these machines, but it appeared to open the door easily. The lights in the console room brightened when they entered and his granddaughter laughed as she spun around the room happily.

“You are the most beautiful thing that I’ve ever seen,” he whispered to the ship fondly. After all, it was this ship that would take him away from here and out into time and space. He had been dreaming of this for centuries and now, it was happening.

His granddaughter taught him the basics of flying the TARDIS. Correcting the things that he always seemed to get wrong when he had been studying for his test centuries ago. It was probably for the best that he had forgotten some things, so he wasn’t fighting bad habits. The High Council on Gallifrey had tried a few times to contact them and demand that he return the ship that he had stolen. Adamant that he was fulfilling his purpose in the universe by following the path of this circular paradox with his granddaughter, he maintained radio silence with his homeworld. They were on the run for now, hiding from the other Time Lords until they forgot about him and decided to leave him alone.

After a few trips to various planets and time periods, where they took notes on the interesting things they found and he got the hang of piloting the ship, Arkytior finally suggested a trip to Earth. They landed in the 1960s and the TARDIS chameleon circuit disguised the ship as a blue Police Box. They were parked in a junkyard, unnoticed amongst various rubbish, as they went out to explore the streets of London.

“Where shall we go first, Arkytior?” he asked as they walked down the busy sidewalk.

“Best not call me that on Earth, Grandfather. It would stand out far too much,” she told him.

“Well, you haven’t told me what the English equivalent would be, so what shall I call you then?” he huffed.

“How about Susan? It isn’t my grandmother’s name, but I’m not sure I’d be comfortable with you calling me by her name. You’ve always called me Arkytior or Susan,” she said.

He was frustrated that she still hadn’t told him what his soulmate’s name on Earth was exactly. Arkytior were a lovely flower on Gallifrey. Large blossoms with soft petals and an elegant, soft fragrance. They were usually pink and yellow, though other colours had been bred from time to time.

“You still won’t tell me her name,” he sighed.

Susan didn’t say anything, she didn’t have to. She did however lead him towards her grandmother’s favourite chip shop to introduce him to her favourite Earth foods.

\------

He wanted to stay on Earth and learn as much as he could about it, at least for a while. So Susan enrolled in the nearby highschool. She looked to be about the right age, and she hadn’t ever attended a normal school. Her parents had taught her themselves, knowing that she would surpass the human children far too quickly. It was fun to socialize with them and immerse herself in the culture. The only difficulty was that she kept accidentally mentioning theories or technology that hadn’t been invented yet, and had never really learned the details of the local currency. So when she knew more about physics than her teacher, but couldn’t tell how many shillings were in a pound, they got a bit suspicious.

Theta had been studying Earth flowers, determined to figure out which of them would be the name of his beloved. There were a few possibilities, but he wasn’t sure if he should be focused on the shape of the blooms, the plant on which they grew, or the typical colouring. He had spent the day in the park, studying the flowers there and making notes in his journal, but it was getting dark now and Susan would be finished at school for the day. 

He tucked his book away in one of the pockets of his coat and made his way through the foggy evening back towards the junkyard on Totter’s Lane. He had just unlocked the door and heard Susan greet him from inside when he heard someone behind him call, “Excuse me.”

“What are you doing here?” he asked, quickly closing the TARDIS door behind him.

“We're looking for a young girl,” the man said as he approached.

“We?” Theta wondered, only seeing one person.

“Good evening,” a woman said, coming out from behind him.

“What do you want?” Theta demanded, unsure of what these people were doing, following his granddaughter here.

“One of our pupils, Susan Foreman, came into this yard,” the man told him.

“Really? In here? Are you sure?” he said, hoping that maybe he could convince them to go away.

“Yes, we saw her from across the street,” the woman replied.

“One of their pupils, not the police, then,” he mumbled to himself.

“I beg your pardon?” the man asked.

“Why were you spying on her? Who are you?” Theta demanded. It was his responsibility to protect his granddaughter while she was with him. He may not have been there to raise her or her parents yet, but he had been entrusted with her for the time being.

“We heard a young girl's voice call out to you,” the man said, avoiding the questions.

“Your hearing must be very acute. I didn't hear anything,” he insisted.

“It came from in here,” the woman said as she walked around him toward the TARDIS.

“You imagined it.”

“I certainly did not imagine it,” she protested.

They argued for quite some time after about whether or not anyone would be hiding inside the cupboard sized box that the TARDIS had disguised itself as. The pair of teachers insisted that they were going to fetch a policeman since he obviously had locked their young pupil inside the box and they were terribly worried about her. It was then, of course, that Susan herself decided to see what all the ruckus was about.

“What are you doing out there?” Susan called as she opened the TARDIS door.

“She is in there!” the man shouted.

“Close the door!” Theta called to his granddaughter urgently.

Theta moved to physically stop the man from barging inside his ship, but couldn’t stop them both. 

“Barbara!” the human shouted before Theta gave in and simply followed the pair of them inside to figure out how to deal with this mess.

The humans were staring at the large, white console room in awe. The concept of a ship being larger on the inside than the outside was far beyond human understanding in any time period, so it was no surprise that they were having trouble coping with where they’d found themselves. Susan was standing by the console, at the door controls.

“Close the door, Susan. I believe these people are known to you,” Theta told her.

“They're two of my schoolteachers. What are you doing here?” she asked in confusion.

“Where are we?” the woman questioned.

“They must have followed you. It’s my fault for keeping us in one place for so long, I suppose,” he sighed.

“But why should they follow me?” Susan asked.

“Is this really where you live, Susan?” the woman questioned.

“Yes.”

“And what's wrong with it?” her grandfather protested. This ship had been marvellous for them. Yes, it was old, but all of the rooms adjusted to meet their needs perfectly. He had been more comfortable here than he had ever been on Gallifrey.

“But it was just a telephone box,” the man argued.

“Perhaps,” Theta replied, grasping the lapels of his jacket.

“And this is your grandfather?” the woman asked.

“Yes,” Susan assured them.

“But why didn't you tell us that?” the woman demanded of him.

“I don't discuss my private life with strangers,” he told them, still unsure of their intentions. 

“But it was a police telephone box. I walked all around it. Barbara, you saw me,” the man insisted, still unable to process the dimensional transcendence of the ship.

“You don't deserve any explanations. You pushed your way in here uninvited and unwelcome,” Theta told them, still unsure of just what to do about these people having discovered their secret. He could feel something in the timelines pulling at him. The next few hours would shape his life forever and he didn’t know exactly what it was he was supposed to do.

They argued for quite some time about how it was possible for the ship to be bigger on the inside, about it being a ship at all, and about time travel, but in the end, Theta decided that it was too big a risk to let them leave the ship and tell anyone about their secret. He wouldn’t let them out the doors and started the engines to move the ship into the time vortex.

It was a rough flight, a few of the circuits were broken and he hadn’t been able to find replacement parts on Earth. But he managed to land the ship with Susan’s help.

“Ian? Ian,” the woman called as she recovered from falling during the flight. He seemed to recall the man calling her Barbara a few times, so he gathered he ought to try and remember their names.

“I'm all right. I must have hit my head. The movement's stopped,” Ian replied, pushing himself back up off the floor.

“The base is steady,” Susan reported as she checked the readings on the console.

“Layer of sand, rock formation. Good,” Theta said as he checked the environmental analysis.

“We've left 1963,” Susan said.

“Oh, yes, undoubtedly. I'll be able to tell you where presently. Zero? That's not right. I'm afraid this yearometer is not calculating properly. Hm! Well, anyway, the journey's finished,” Theta told them after completing the landing procedures.

They argued again at the impossibility of the idea that the ship had moved in time or space, but really he’d had enough of their ignorant statements.

“You really are a stubborn young man, aren't you?” Theta snapped at Ian.

“All right, show me some proof. Give me some concrete evidence. I'm sorry, Susan, I don't want to hurt you, but it's time you were brought back to reality,” Ian argued.

“But you're wrong, Mister Chesterton,” Susan told him.

“They are saying I'm a charlatan. What concrete evidence would satisfy you?” Theta asked.

“Just open the doors, Doctor Foreman,” Ian insisted.

“Eh? Doctor who? What's he talking about?” Theta wondered. And he felt something snap into place. The humans were still arguing, but he felt time slow around him for a moment. 

Doctor Foreman? Why would the young man call him that? Foreman? Ah, that was the surname that Susan had been using at the school. It was a reasonable assumption among humans that he would share the name, he supposed, but he felt no attachment to it. There was something however about the title of Doctor. It gave one a certain amount of authority and respect. He was certainly far more educated than the human doctors in any time period. It was a common practice among Time Lords to choose a name for themselves when they felt the flow of their timeline take on a new path. Theta Sigma had been a nickname that he’d adopted just before starting at the Academy, he’d never really liked it, but it served its purpose. He was now moving into a new phase of his long life and the name Doctor felt like just the name for him now.

He didn’t even really need to make the decision himself. He simply didn’t correct anyone as Ian and Barbara kept calling him Doctor. Through several adventures, everyone called him Doctor. Everyone except Susan, of course. She only ever called him grandfather. After a long and tiresome time spent with Marco Polo, he spoke with her privately in the library one evening.

“You don’t seem too surprised that everyone keeps calling me Doctor or that the TARDIS refuses to change into anything other than a Police Box,” he said, breaking the silence.

“Very few things about you will surprise me, grandfather,” she told him with a smile.

“Is it terribly difficult for you to hide all that you know about my travels?” he asked.

“You actually made sure that I knew very little about your first form. I’m only meant to start you on your journey, not stay with you for long,” she explained.

“First form? So I’ll not be in this regeneration when I send you back?” he asked.

“Oh grandfather, you know I shouldn’t tell you those things. I’m sorry, but it will be a long time before you meet her. I can’t say more than that,” she admitted with a sigh.

He looked away, his hearts aching a little more. He had waited so long already to find his soulmate. If he understood what Arkytior was saying, it would likely be more centuries yet before he found her.

“I’m sorry. It’s harder seeing you without her than it is keeping secrets from you. The two of you fit so perfectly together that seeing you alone is like looking at a puzzle that isn’t finished yet,” she told him.

“But we will be happy? Someday?” he asked, his eyes pleading for some reassurance.

“The happiest couple I’ve ever known,” she said.

\---------

They travelled together for some time, had many adventures together and met new friends along the way. There came a time though, when Susan fell in love with a human of her own. It was then that the Doctor decided to let her move on from her time with him.

He listened to their conversation through the monitor on the ship and prepared the engines to leave.

“Please stay. Please stay here with me,” David said to Susan.

“I can't stay, David. I don't belong to this time,” she argued.

“But I love you, Susan, and I want you to marry me,” he insisted.

“You see, David. Grandfather needs me. Oh, don't make me choose between you and him, please!” she cried.

“But you told me! You said that you'd never known the security of living in one place and one time. Look, you said it was something that you always longed for. Well, I'm giving you that, Susan. I'm giving you a place, a time, an identity,” David said.

“Oh David, I do love you! I do, I do, I do!” Susan answered, throwing herself in his arms.

Inside the TARDIS, the Doctor made his decision. It was time, so he closed the doors.

“Grandfather!” she shouted from outside.

“Listen, Susan, please. I've double-locked the doors. You can't get in. Now move back, child, where I can see you,” he told her from inside the ship. “I've been taking care of you while you’ve been with me and, you in return have been taking care of me.”

“Oh, Grandfather, I belong with you!” she argued.

“Perhaps. But not with this me. You have your mobile, I know you’ve kept it with you all this time. You can return to the life you left before starting me out on this journey. I will keep looking for her and some day come full circle with you,” he said. “Until then, there must be no regrets, no tears, no anxieties. Just go forward in all your beliefs, and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine. Goodbye, Susan, goodbye, my dear.”

  
  
  
  



	2. Two

The Doctor decided, after Susan was gone, to simply live his life on the path she had set out for him. He trusted that somewhere along the line, he would meet his soulmate and the happy life that she promised would begin. In the meantime, there was a universe to explore.

Of course, once the Time Lords got their hands on him, he certainly didn’t want to be trapped on Gallifrey again. He wasn’t about to have more centuries of opportunity to find her taken away. 

“They will both continue their lives as if nothing had happened,” the Time Lord official assured him after sending away Jamie and Zoe.

“Yes, very efficient. Now then, what about me?” he asked worriedly.

“We have accepted your plea that there is evil in the universe that must be fought, and that you still have a part to play in that battle,” they admitted.

“What? You mean that you're going to let me go free?” he was hopeful, but doubted that he would be so lucky.

“Not entirely. We have noted your particular interest in the planet Earth. The frequency of your visits must have given you special knowledge of that world and it's problems,” the official announced.

“Yes, I suppose that's true. Earth seems more vulnerable than others, yes,” the Doctor agreed. He couldn’t let them know the true reason for his interest in that particular planet. They were the embodiment of xenophobia and would never approve of an interspecies match.

“For that reason, you will be sent back to that planet,” they decreed.

“Oh, good.”

“In exile,” the official informed him.

“In exile?” he gasped. For how long? What if it was in the wrong period to meet her? He couldn’t be stuck in one time.

“You will be sent to Earth in the twentieth century, and will remain there for as long as we deem proper, and for that period the secret of the TARDIS will be taken from you,” they explained.

“But you, you can't condemn me to exile on one primitive planet in one century in time! Besides, I'm known on the Earth. It might be very awkward for me.”

“Your appearance has changed before, it will change again. That is part of the sentence,” they told him.

His forced regeneration left him disoriented for quite some time. But he eventually set up an alliance with UNIT and did his best to keep looking for the woman who would say the words etched upon his arm. Words that would always be there, through every renewal.

The Doctor met many brilliant people during his years stuck on Earth. He was always sad though to see his friends leave and move on with their brief human lives. Being stuck there only emphasized the differences in a human life from those of his own species. He started to wonder how his life with a human soulmate could be so wonderful as Susan had insisted it would be. After centuries of waiting for her, he would likely only get a few decades with her at most. It would never be enough.

He pondered this over and over again, during one of these episodes, Sarah Jane found him sulking in the library. He was sprawled out on the sofa, fiddling with the tassels on his scarf.

“Penny for your thoughts,” she said, startling him.

He sat quietly for a few more moments. She was a good friend to him and he thought she might have some insight into his worries.

“Are you familiar with soulmates, Sarah Jane?” he asked.

She seemed a bit flustered for a moment, then answered, “Of course, Doctor.”

“I’ve had these words on my arm for centuries. An English phrase that I can only assume will come from someone on Earth. Someone I know that I’m destined to meet and have children with. I’ve already met my granddaughter, though she couldn’t tell me much,” he explained.

Sarah Jane seemed upset by the conversation, but he wasn’t quite sure why that would be. Perhaps she hadn’t yet found her match either.

“I never put much faith in those things,” she said.

“Do you have a mark?” he wondered.

“No. They’re rare. I’ve never actually seen one in person,” she admitted.

“It scares me,” he told her. “That she’s human. I’m already over 700 years old by human standards. Human lives are so fleeting. How can I look forward to loving someone who will only be with me for a handful of decades? My hearts are breaking before I’ve even found her.”

“I’ve always felt that it’s best to simply enjoy the moment and live in the present. Besides, some things are worth getting your heart broken for,” she said, then left him to his thoughts again.

Live in the present. That’s basically what Arkytior had told him. Perhaps that was the only way to enjoy a life so long as his. Take things a moment at a time. 

His next stark reminder of his soulmate’s existence in his life came when facing the Valeyard. The man was apparently some amalgamation of his darker sides brought to life in one of his later incarnations. He wanted the Doctor dead so that he could take his remaining regenerations and be free. Free to destroy, and he said, free to take his precious flower for himself. It could only be a reference to her. In defeating the Valeyard then, he was protecting his future with her as well.

His eighth form was much more adept at seeing timelines than any of his previous selves. He spent quite some time trying to catch glimpses of a future with her. Just a flash of her face or her name to give him hope as all of his friends came and went, taking a piece of his hearts with them every time.

He did get a few visits with Susan and her son during that time though. During one of those visits at Christmas time, he had a chance to speak with her alone in the library. Her son, Alex had gone to explore the TARDIS with Lucie for a bit.

“How long did you get with David?” he asked her quietly.

“Not long. It would never be enough time, really,” she admitted.

“And that’s what I have to look forward to?” he questioned, tears filling the corners of his eyes.

“Oh grandfather, don’t think like that,” Susan insisted.

“How can I not? I know that my soulmate is human. They are like mayflies to us. I’ve lived over a thousand of their years, and I’ll only get a few decades with her at most! It breaks my hearts to watch my friends come and go, dozens of them, how will I survive when my hearts go with her in the end?” the Doctor shouted as he paced the room.

“I can’t tell you about any of that, you know that. But what I can say is that you have the greatest ship in the universe and access to the medical treatments throughout all of time and space. A human life can be extended. David and I stayed here on Earth, he didn’t want to go in search of advanced treatments for his illness. The future you did offer to take us, but despite all that, my few years with him were some of the best of my life. I don’t regret it and neither will you,” she assured him.

He collapsed onto the sofa and covered his face with his hands as he tried to regain control over his emotions. Time with Susan was always precious to him, but it was also a reminder of why she had come into his life in the first place. “I’m not sure how much longer I can do this,” he mumbled.

“Not long now,” she said.

He looked up at her sharply, hope glistening in his eyes. “Really? Truly?”

“Yes. I know I shouldn’t be saying this, but grandfather I can’t stand to see you so distraught. Soon, I promise,” Susan told him.

But then came the Time War. It was hard to say exactly how long the War lasted. In proper, linear time, maybe only fifty years or so. But with all the loops and resets that Time Lords were painfully aware of, it felt like centuries again. It made it difficult to really be sure how old he was anymore, not that he could ever really keep track with all of his travels, but which was more important? One’s mental age or physical age? And what did it matter anymore.

He had lost everything. Well, everything but his beloved TARDIS. And it had fallen to him to be the one to end it all. He was a monster. He hardly dared call himself Doctor now, for he certainly was helping no one.

After activating the Moment, his body had renewed itself again, a fresh regeneration to start over. But he hadn’t cared, threw on the first clothes he came across in the wardrobe, and didn’t even bother looking in the mirror to see what his new face looked like. He spent months throwing himself at fixed points in time, almost hoping to die in the fires at Krakatoa, or drown in the frozen sea when the Titanic sank.

One life threatening adventure after another, hoping that one of them might end the silence screaming in his mind after he had wiped out his entire race. By finally taking him from the universe as well. 

Finding an odd signal on Earth yet again, he landed the ship to investigate. A warp shunt was being used and he could only think of one race that preferred that technology. The Nestene. He traced the signal to a clothing shop in London in 2005. His best bet, he figured, would be to take a bomb and blow up the transmitter. He should probably seek out the source instead, but he’d rather place the bomb and hopefully get blown to pieces with it.

He parked the TARDIS across the street from the shop and carried the bomb inside with him. The transmitter was likely on the roof, but he found a couple of life signals on his sonic and had to get the humans out of here first. And so, he got into the service elevator and made his way down to the basement. One of the life signs disappeared before he could get there, and he knew there must be Autons in the building then. The other human was in danger here, so he pinpointed the location and ran.

Ahead of him, he could hear a woman shouting, probably trying to get the Autons to leave her alone, but he knew that wouldn’t work. He’d tried that tactic with them before. He reached the corner where she was surrounded just in time to grab her hand.

“Run!” he told her and pulled the young girl away from the creatures that had her cornered.

The young lady stumbled a bit as he pulled her with him, back to the service elevator. But she quickly found her feet and kept up with him. He tossed her into the elevator and pushed the button to close the doors behind them, but one of the Autons had forced itself halfway into the lift. He could push it back out, maybe, or just pull its arm off and the doors would close properly. He decided to pull and the limb went back to imobile plastic as soon as it was disconnected from the body.

“You pulled his arm off,” she said.

His eyes went wide and their gazes met. The shock on her face at his reaction meant that she knew as well. And he was sure that somewhere on her skin, was written the word, ‘Run.’

It was her. He’d waited his whole life to meet this woman and now that the moment had come, he just needed to get her out of the building to safety. But then what? He had planned on blowing himself up along with the building. Could he make himself do it now? Looking into her beautiful, whiskey coloured eyes, he didn’t think he could. In fact, he might be so bold as to reclaim his title of Doctor and start fresh.

He cleared his throat and got back to the task at hand, “Right, umm. Arm, yes. Plastic.”

“Very clever. Nice trick! Who were they then, students? Is this a student thing or what?” she accused and he spent the next few minutes trying to convince her that they were in fact living plastic creatures and she needed to get out of the building immediately.

He pushed her out the door, then realized that he hadn’t even gotten her name. Opening it once more, he called to her, “I'm the Doctor, by the way. What's your name?”

“Rose.”

“Nice to meet you, Rose. Run for your life!” he told her with a manic grin and shut the door again before running up the stairs to the roof. 

He placed the bomb on the transmitter there, then threw himself across the gap to the next building and took cover before the explosion tossed debris everywhere. The Doctor had lived. He saved Rose and lived.

Making his way back to the TARDIS, he had only one question circling in his head. Now what? He didn’t know where she lived, her full name, or have any idea how to find her again. And should he find her? Despite his decision to simply start fresh, what he had done in the Time War was still a part of him. He was still the monster that he loathed deep inside. What did he really have to offer a vibrant, beautiful, young human? He would only tarnish her. Maybe it would be best to stay away, despite the paradox that could happen without Susan’s birth.

The timelines were tugging at him in a way that he was sure meant that he wouldn’t be able to keep away from Rose forever, but for his own conscience, he would try. 


	3. Three

The Doctor spent the rest of the night trying to trace the signal back to the source of the Nestene Consciousness. He knew the Autons were just the foot soldiers and there would be one main body sending out the control signals. He just couldn’t get a fix on it.

As he was working on that, of course, his mind kept going back to Rose. Of all of the Earth’s flowers that were used as common English names, he had thought that Rose was quite likely. While Arkytior grew in a similar manner to Earth tulips, the blooms looked more like roses. And Tulip was certainly not often used as a girl’s name. She was beautiful, and even with their brief meeting, he could tell that she was bright and brave. Her reasoning made sense and she wasn’t screaming or cowering away from it all. But why was he dwelling on this now? He had no way of finding her again, and she’d be better off without him anyway.

He managed to program his sonic to trace the faint signal he tracked from the shop and followed it to a block of flats. On one of the upper floors, the signal seemed to go through the small cat flap into one of the flats. He poked at it a bit, then it suddenly opened, revealing the face of Rose.

She quickly opened the door to face him, both staring at each other for a moment, not quite sure what to say.

“What're you doing here?” he asked finally.

“I live here,” she replied.

“Well, what do you do that for?” he questioned. This was where the signal was coming from. She wasn’t safe here.

“Because I do. I'm only at home because someone blew up my job,” she said accusingly.

“I must have got the wrong signal. You're not plastic, are you?” he asked, knocking on her forehead. “No, bonehead. Bye, then.”

He was hoping he could get away from her again, but she grabbed his leather jacket and tugged him back into the flat, shutting the door behind him.

“You. Inside. Right now,” she demanded.

“Who is it?” he heard someone call from further inside.

“It's about last night. He's part of the inquiry. Give us ten minutes,” Rose called back. It was a good excuse, he’d give her that much.

“She deserves compensation,” the other woman told him. She was in the first bedroom just inside the flat. The woman appeared to be about forty, probably Rose’s mother, and was currently in her dressing gown.

“Oh, we're talking millions,” he agreed, playing along with Rose’s excuse for his presence.

She tried flirting with him then, but he quickly got away from that situation and followed Rose into the main living area.

“Don't mind the mess. Do you want a coffee?” Rose asked.

“Might as well, thanks. Just milk,” he told her.

“We should go to the police. Seriously. Both of us,” Rose called to him from the kitchen. “I'm not blaming you, even if it was just some sort of joke that went wrong. They said on the news they'd found a body.”

He let her talk, not really offering any more explanation to her than he had last night. He took those few moments to explore the living room for a bit, looking at magazines and books left lying around. He found a bit of mail with her name on it.

“Rose Tyler,” he said to himself. The name rolled off his tongue like music and he fell a bit harder already.

There was a mirror on the wall and he figured he might as well finally take a look. He’d been in this body for months already, but had avoided mirrors thus far. He looked far older than her, his nose was quite large and his ears stuck out awkwardly.

“Ah, could've been worse. Look at the ears,” he mumbled.

She was still talking from the kitchen about the man who had died last night and about going to the police. He just let her voice wash over him as he took in the little details of her life. He suddenly heard the cat flap rattle from the front door.

“What's that, then? You got a cat?” he asked.

“No,” Rose told him. “We did have, but now they're just strays. They come in off the estate.”

He couldn’t even call for help when he was suddenly attacked by the plastic arm from the shop. It had somehow followed them here and was now trying to strangle him. He would be alright for a bit with his respiratory bypass, but it was cutting off circulation to his head and before long, he might lose consciousness. Rose walked in from the kitchen with two cups of coffee, but thought he was messing around.

“I told Mickey to chuck that out. You're all the same. Give a man a plastic hand. Anyway, I don't even know your name. Doctor, what was it?” she asked.

He managed to wrestle it off of himself, but it flew onto her face instead. He moved to save her, tumbling them both onto the coffee table before he could use his sonic to disrupt the signal.

“It's all right, I've stopped it. There you go, you see? Armless,” he assured her and tossed the plastic arm back at her.

She caught it and decided to whack him with it in retaliation, “Do you think?”

“Ow!” he exclaimed and left the flat.

Rose chased him down the stairs and outside. It seemed that it wouldn’t be easy to push her away for her own good, but he could damn well try.

“Hold on a minute. You can't just go swanning off,” she called.

“Yes I can. Here I am. This is me, swanning off. See you,” he told her with a wave and kept walking.

“But you’re, we’re, I’m sure of it. And that arm was moving. It tried to kill me,” she argued.

“Ten out of ten for observation.”

“You can't just walk away. That's not fair. You've got to tell me what's going on,” Rose insisted, keeping up with his brisk pace easily.

“No, I don't,” he said.

“All right, then. I'll go to the police. I'll tell everyone. You said, if I did that, I'd get people killed. So, your choice. Tell me, or I'll start talking,” she threatened.

“Is that supposed to sound tough?” he asked, calling her bluff.

“Sort of,” she mumbled.

“Doesn't work,” he said.

“Who are you?” she pleaded.

“Told you. The Doctor.”

“Yeah, but Doctor what?” she asked.

“Just the Doctor.”

“The Doctor,” she repeated.

“Hello!” he said with a wave.

“Is that supposed to sound impressive?”

“Sort of,” he said, just as she had earlier.

“Come on, then. You can tell me. I've seen enough. Are you the police?” she asked.

“No, I was just passing through. I'm a long way from home,” he told her, still hoping that maybe he could shake her off and send her back home. He was doubting that more and more though. She was stubborn. Of course, she’d have to be if she was his soulmate.

“But what have I done wrong? How comes those plastic things keep coming after me?” she asked.

“Oh, suddenly the entire world revolves around you. You were just an accident. You got in the way, that's all,” he said, thinking maybe if he was really rude to her, she’d get angry enough to leave.

“It tried to kill me,” she argued.

“It was after me, not you. Last night, in the shop, I was there, you blundered in, almost ruined the whole thing. This morning, I was tracking it down, it was tracking me down. The only reason it fixed on you is 'cos you've met me,” he told her.

“But we were supposed to meet then, weren’t we?” she asked, suddenly rubbing at her upper arm. He guessed that was where her soulmark was. He knew that she’d gathered why he was so shocked at the first words she said to him, so what could he do now?

“I don’t have time for this, I’m the only one that can stop this thing,” he deflected.

“So what you're saying is, the entire world revolves around you?” she said.

“Sort of, yeah,” he replied rudely.

“You're full of it.”

“Sort of, yeah,” he repeated.

“But, all this plastic stuff. Who else knows about it?” she asked.

“No one,” he told her.

“What, you're on your own?” she wondered. He was in awe of her already. Despite his rudeness and dismissive behaviour, she still seemed worried about him facing the Nestene all alone.

“Well, who else is there? I mean, you lot, all you do is eat chips, go to bed, and watch telly, while all the time, underneath you, there's a war going on,” he snapped.

“Okay. Start from the beginning. I mean, if we're going to go with the living plastic, and I don't even believe that, but if we do, how did you kill it?” she asked, clearly not giving up.

“The thing controlling it projects life into the arm. I cut off the signal, dead,” he explained.

“So that's radio control?” she reasoned.

“Thought control. Are you all right?” he asked, surprised that she was keeping up with all this and so far seeming to believe him.

“Yeah. So, who's controlling it, then?” she asked.

“Long story.”

“But what's it all for? I mean, shop window dummies, what's that about? Is someone trying to take over Britain's shops?” she asked, her frustration with him growing.

“No.”

“No?”

“It's not a price war,” he told her. “They want to overthrow the human race and destroy you. Do you believe me?”

“No,” she said.

“But you're still listening,” he said, unable to deny that she had impressed him.

“Really, though, Doctor. Tell me, who are you?” she insisted.

“Do you know like we were saying about the Earth revolving? It's like when you were a kid. The first time they tell you the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it because everything looks like it's standing still,” he explained, taking her hand in his. “I can feel it. The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning at a thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling ‘round the sun at sixty seven thousand miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me, clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go. That's who I am. Now, forget me, Rose Tyler. Go home.”

He dropped her hand and walked away, back toward the TARDIS. It didn’t seem like she was following him for the moment. If he could just get inside, then the perception filter would keep her from finding him again.

  
  


Of course the Nestene had locked itself onto her though. It was impersonating her friend and he had to follow her again. Rose seemed to accept the fact that he was an alien with a spaceship fairly well, despite having a bit of trouble keeping calm when the Auton disguised as her friend attacked them. She did help him find the source though, and even risked her life to save him before he fell into the pit with the Nestene Consciousness. By the end of it all, he had to admit that there was no way that he could just leave without her now.

“A fat lot of good you were,” Rose said after skipping out of the TARDIS near her home.

“Nestene Consciousness? Easy,” he said with a snap of his fingers.

“You were useless in there. You'd be dead if it wasn't for me,” she countered.

“Yes, I would. Thank you. Right then, I'll be off, unless, er, I don't know, you could come with me,” he offered. “This box isn't just a London hopper, you know. It goes anywhere in the universe free of charge.”

“Don't. He's an alien. He's a thing,” her friend, Mickey told her. “I know you said that he’s-, but you can’t!”

“He's not invited,” the Doctor told her. “What do you think? You could stay here, fill your life with work and food and sleep, or you could go anywhere.”

“Is it always this dangerous?” she asked, and he could feel the timelines stretched as they made their decisions.

“Yeah,” he admitted.

He could see her struggling with the decision. Mickey was clinging to her legs like a frightened child. There was something else that she needed to convince her, he could see it in her eyes. She wanted to say yes, knowing that they should be together, but she was worried about something else. Her hand went back to that spot on her arm that she had touched before when she was trying to ask if his soulmark meant the same as hers.

“I’m, I don’t… Did I imagine it?” she asked.

He swallowed, not quite ready to admit it, but needing her to come with him. If it were any other potential companion, he would have left by now, but this was Rose.

“Did I mention it also travels in time?” he told her.

Pulling herself away from her friend’s grasp, she ran into the ship and a new way of life with him, in the TARDIS.

After centuries of looking for her, combined with his own ego, he felt the need to impress her. So, after a bit of teasing, he took her to see the day the Earth was burned up by the sun. She was just as wonderful at helping him during that catastrophe. There were a few minutes where she had been overwhelmed by suddenly being surrounded by aliens when she hadn’t even known they existed before meeting him. But she adapted quickly and showed intense compassion for everyone on the space station. Even Cassandra in the end.

He watched her standing by the observation window. She was staring at the planet burning below. After all they’d been through, he moved to her side and took her hand in his.

“The end of the Earth. It's gone. We were too busy saving ourselves. No one saw it go. All those years, all that history, and no one was even looking. It's just-,” she said.

“Come with me,” he replied and took her back to the TARDIS. 

He flew the ship back to a busy London street to assure her that her world was still there.

“You think it'll last forever, people and cars and concrete, but it won't. One day it's all gone. Even the sky. My planet's gone. It's dead. It burned like the Earth. It's just rocks and dust before its time,” he told her as the crowds pushed past them.

“What happened?” she asked.

“There was a war and we lost,” he said.

“A war with who? What about your people?” Rose wondered.

“I'm a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords. They're all gone. I'm the only survivor. I'm left travelling on my own 'cos there's no one else,” the Doctor admitted. It wasn’t everything that she needed to know about him and the war, but it was a start.

“There's me,” she offered, taking his hand.

“You've seen how dangerous it is. Do you want to go home?” he asked.

“I don't know. I want. Oh, can you smell chips?” she said.

“Yeah. Yeah,” he chuckled at her deflection.

“I want chips,” she said.

“Me too.”

“Right then, before you get me back in that box, chips it is, and you can pay,” she told him.

“No money,” he admitted.

“What sort of date are you? Come on then, tightwad, chips are on me. We've only got five billion years till the shops close,” she teased.

It suddenly made sense, where Arkytior had brought him when they first came to Earth so long ago. This was the exact chip shop they’d visited back then. She’d been giving him a sign and preparing him for this all along. He sat in one of the booths while Rose bought a couple of baskets of chips for them. Staring out the window at London passing by, he knew that it was time to talk to Rose about their marks.

They sat in silence for a few minutes while he gathered his thoughts. Over the centuries, he had practiced what he would say to her hundreds of times, but now that he was really here with her, all of those speeches went out the metaphorical window.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally.

“For what?” she asked.

“For trying to push you away. I shouldn’t have, but I have good reason to,” he told her.

“It’s true then? I didn’t imagine the way you reacted to the first words I said to you?” she asked.

“You didn’t imagine it,” he admitted and slid up his sleeve so that she could see the mark on his arm.

“Will you tell me why?” she wondered.

“My species is very long lived, Rose. I’ve had this mark since I was 8 years old. On my planet, I’d be about 900 years old now. By Earth years, well over a thousand. It’s always scared me, knowing from the language this is written in that you’d probably be human. Human lives are so short,” he closed his eyes as he tried to continue without crying. This version of him couldn’t let that vulnerability show.

“I was looking for you for centuries. I’ve had a lot of human friends travel with me in that time, and they always leave. It hurts, saying goodbye over and over again. If we stay together and get as close as these marks imply, I don’t know how I’ll stand saying goodbye again,” he admitted. It wasn’t everything that should keep them apart, but it was the part that had scared him longer than anything else.

“Do you want me to leave?” she asked, her voice trembling.

“No. I don’t want you to. But I should. I’m a broken soldier, I’m no good for someone like you,” he told her.

“Thing is, Doctor, soulmates are rare. Most people don’t get that gift in their lives. My mum did, but my dad died in an accident when I was just a baby. They only had a few years together, but mum says they were the best years of her life. And they gave her me,” she said, playing with one of her chips. “I don’t want to leave, unless you don’t want me around. I don’t want to hurt you. I hope that together we could build something that you can look back on as being worth it.”

“I’m not sure I’m ready to get that close to anyone. But I don’t think I could stand to send you away. Could we just be friends for now?” he asked.

“Yeah. We don’t really know each other yet. I mean, we’ve had some pretty intense things happen together, but we don’t have to rush,” she said.

The Doctor took her to meet Charles Dickens then. It wasn’t exactly what he had been aiming for, but it was exciting to meet Charley Boy nonetheless. Of course, he just about got Rose killed, again. It seemed like no matter where he brought her, he put her precious life in danger. As if it weren’t bad enough that she would die after too short a life, he didn’t need to rush things by throwing her into constantly life-threatening situations.

She asked to visit her mum after that, just to check in, she said. Rose was sure to insist that she wasn’t leaving the TARDIS. He was still fairly convinced that she should, but he brought her home 12 hours after they’d left, so she could check on her mother.

Of course, just after Rose left the TARDIS, he double checked the date. Gods! He couldn’t do anything right! Chasing after her, he returned to the flat where he’d found her a few days ago in their timeline. He dashed through the door without even knocking and saw a gobsmacked Jackie Tyler staring at Rose.

“It's not twelve hours, it's twelve months. You've been gone a whole year. Sorry,” he announced.

Jackie had called the police then, sitting both he and Rose down in the living room.

“The hours I've sat here, days and weeks and months, all on my own. I thought you were dead, and where were you? Travelling. What the hell does that mean, travelling? That's no sort of answer. You ask her. She won't tell me. That's all she says. Travelling,” Jackie ranted as the officer took down a few notes.

“That's what I was doing,” Rose insisted. It was true after all, just not the way they would usually think.

“When your passport's still in the drawer? It's just one lie after another,” Jackie shouted.

“I meant to phone. I really did. I just I forgot,” Rose said.

“What, for a year? You forgot for a year? And I am left sitting here. I just don't believe you. Why won't you tell me where you've been?” 

“Actually, it's my fault. I sort of er, employed Rose as my companion,” the Doctor interjected. What else was he supposed to say? It wasn’t his place to tell Jackie that he was her daughter’s soulmate. That was something that was generally discussed in private.

“When you say companion, is this a sexual relationship?” the policeman asked.

“No!” Rose and the Doctor both responded.

“Then what is it? Because you, you waltz in here all charm and smiles, and the next thing I know, she vanishes off the face of the Earth! How old are you then? Forty? Forty five? What, did you find her on the Internet? Did you go online and pretend you're a doctor?” Jackie demanded of him.

“I am a Doctor,” he replied.

“Prove it. Stitch this, mate!” she shouted and smacked him across the face.

After that, the policeman left, deciding that this was something to be worked out between them and no crime had been committed. Rose suggested that the Doctor go take a seat up on the roof and she would join him in a bit.

He did as she suggested and just sat, overlooking the city as he waited for her to come and tell him that it was over. Between all the horrible situations that he’d put her through and this besides, she’d never stay with him now. Even when he tried to stop pushing her away, he was already ruining her life. 

It wasn’t long before she joined him up there and sat next to him.

“I can't tell her. I can't even begin. She's never going to forgive me. And I missed a year. Was it good?” she rambled.

“Middling,” he replied.

She stared at him for a moment. He thought she would shout at him the same way her mother did, but she seemed to come to some kind of conclusion.

“Are you going to stay here now?” he asked.

“I don't know. I can't do that to her again, though,” Rose told him honestly. “I can’t believe she slapped you!”

“Nine hundred years of time and space, and I've never been slapped by someone's mother,” he grumbled.

“Your face,” she laughed.

“It hurt!” he complained, holding his cheek.

“You have to admit, even if she’s off by centuries in her estimate, that is one hell of an age gap. Every conversation with you just goes mental. There's no one else I can talk to. I've seen all that stuff up there, the size of it, and I can't say a word. Aliens and spaceships and things, and I'm the only person on planet Earth who knows they exist,” she said.

He was about to tell her that there was UNIT and some of his past companions still around, but just then, a large spaceship flew through the air over their heads, trailing black smoke. It crashed its way through the city before finally ending up in the river.

In all fairness, he tried to keep her away from the danger. He’d gone to the hospital by himself, but when they were being escorted to 10 Downing Street, he couldn’t help but be excited that she was with him. Of course, that was where the real danger ended up being and when it all came down to it, he was faced with the worst decision of his lives.

“Big Ben - why did the Slitheen go and hit Big Ben?” he asked himself.

“You said to gather the experts, to kill them,” Harriet Jones said.

“That lot would've gathered for a weather balloon. You don't need to crash land in the middle of London,” the Doctor told them.

“The Slitheen are hiding, but then they put the entire planet on Red alert. What would they do that for?” Rose wondered, always asking the right questions to help him think.

“Oh, listen to her,” Jackie whined through the speakerphone.

“At least I'm trying,” Rose argued.

“Well, I've got a question, if you don't mind,” Jackie said angrily. “Since that man walked into our lives, I have been attacked ** i** n the streets. I have had creatures from the pits of hell ** i** n my own living room, and my daughter disappear off the face of the Earth.”

“I told you what happened,” Rose interrupted.

“I'm talking to him,” Jackie snapped. “'Cos I've seen this life of yours, Doctor. And maybe you get off on it, and maybe you think it's all clever and smart, but you tell me. Just answer me this. Is my daughter safe?”

“I'm fine,” Rose assured her.

“Is she safe? Will she always be safe? Can you promise me that? Well, what's the answer?” Jackie demanded.

And that was just the thing. That was his own biggest argument for why he should leave his brilliant, beautiful, vibrant Rose behind. He just couldn’t bring himself to actually do it.

“We're in,” Mickey told him. And like that, they were back to saving the world.

Well, he had to save Jackie and Mickey first, from the Slitheen that had broken in to attack them. Then they managed to work out the aliens’ plan. When it all came down to it though, he wasn’t sure that he could go through with the only solution.

Over the phone, Jackie was still making demands of him, “All right, Doctor. I'm not saying I trust you, but there must be something you can do.”

“If we could ferment the port, we could make acetic acid,” Harriet suggested.

“Mickey, any luck?” Rose asked.

“There's loads of emergency numbers. They're all on voicemail,” her friend replied.

“Voicemail dooms us all,” Harriet complained.

“If we could just get out of here,” Rose said.

He had been standing silently against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest as he wallowed in just how horrible a person he’d become. Now he would not only have killed all of his own people, but he’d have to kill his soulmate too.

“There's a way out,” he said.

“What?” Rose asked.

“There's always been a way out,” he told her.

“Then why don't we use it?” Rose wondered, looking him in the eyes curiously.

He gazed back at her but his answer was directed at Jackie through the phone, “Because I can't guarantee your daughter will be safe.”

“Don't you dare. Whatever it is, don't you dare,” Jackie told him.

“That's the thing. If I don't dare, everyone dies,” he argued, hating himself with every word. 

“Do it,” Rose spoke up forcefully, ignoring her mother's words. 

“You don't even know what it is. You'd just let me?” he asked, stunned. 

“Yeah.”

“Please, Doctor. Please. She's my daughter. She's just a kid,” Jackie protested.

“Rose is not just anything, Jackie Tyler. But this is my life. It's not fun, it's not smart, it's just standing up and making a decision because nobody else will,” the Doctor told her.

“Then what're you waiting for?” Rose questioned.

“I could save the world but lose you,” he admitted.

In that moment, he could see that she knew just how far he’d fallen for her already. And he was quite sure that his heartbreak over all of it was making her affection for him that much stronger as well.

“Except it's not your decision, Doctor. It's mine,” Harriet interrupted.

**“** And who the hell are you?” Jackie demanded.

**“** Harriet Jones, MP for Flydale North. The only elected representative in this room, chosen by the people for the people. And on behalf of the people, I command you. Do it.”

While the Doctor had saved the world from being turned into radioactive fuel, it was Rose that had saved their lives. He clung to her tightly in that cupboard, as they were thrown around and convinced they were going to die. But she had done it. Rose saved their lives from his ridiculous plan.

After they’d left Earth again, and were floating safely in the time vortex, Rose admitted that she had told her mother about their soulmarks. Jackie wasn’t happy about it, but she understood. He wasn’t sure how happy he was that she knew. It meant that if he did finally convince Rose to stay behind, Jackie would know just how horrible he really was. He wouldn’t just be depriving himself of his soulmate, but Rose as well. How could she ever find a happy relationship with someone else, when they would see the mark on her and know that it had nothing to do with them?

He knew that eventually he would have to give in to his feelings for Rose. He couldn’t hold back forever, and really, he was just wasting the short amount of time that he would have with her to begin with by pushing her away. He just hated himself too much to allow her to get too close.

  
  
  



	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moving right along... you'll see in this chapter just why Rose's confidence level is a little different from usual. Thank you for all the lovely comments

She had wandered off again. Of all the places for her to get into trouble, it had to be in the middle of the Blitz. There wasn’t really any way to find her, he just had to work on the mystery that he’d run into and hope that their paths crossed again soon. He was reasonably sure that Rose would be looking for the same things he was. They’d been on enough trips together now that he could tell she understood how he usually got through these things. In fact, she seemed to fit into his normal lifestyle perfectly.

This problem though, was a bit terrifying. 

“I suspect the plan is to blow up the hospital and blame it on a German bomb,” Dr. Constantine told him.

“Probably too late,” the Doctor said.

“No. There are isolated cases. Isolated cases breaking out all over London. Stay back, stay back,” Constantine continued, clearly becoming ill himself. “Listen to me. Top floor. Room eight oh two. That's where they took the first victim, the one from the crash site. And you must find Nancy again.”

“Nancy?” the Doctor wondered what she had to do with it.

“It was her brother. She knows more than she's saying. She won't tell me, but she might Mummy. Are you my mummy?” Dr. Constantine tried to explain, but was overcome by the illness, whatever it was.

“Hello?” a man’s voice called from the hallway.

“Hello?” Rose repeated.

Finally, she found him. He couldn’t protect her when she was wandering all over the city in the middle of an air raid.

“Hello?” the man called again and the Doctor met them in the hospital corridor. “Good evening. Hope we're not interrupting. Jack Harkness. I've been hearing all about you on the way over.”

“He knows. I had to tell him about us being Time Agents,” Rose explained with a look. Clearly the man had realized that they were time travellers and accused her of being a Time Agent. He had to admire her ability to roll with the circumstances.

“And it's a real pleasure to meet you, Mister Spock,” Jack said and walked past him into the room the Doctor had just left.

“Mister Spock?” the Doctor whispered to Rose harshly before she followed him.

“What was I supposed to say? You don't have a name. Don't you ever get tired of Doctor? Doctor who?” she countered.

“Nine centuries in, I'm coping. Where've you been? We're in the middle of a London Blitz. It's not a good time for a stroll,” he argued.

“Who's strolling? I went by barrage balloon. Only way to see an air raid,” she replied, making his hearts skip a beat or two.

“What?!”

“Listen, what's a Chula warship?” she asked.

They argued with the man calling himself Captain Jack Harkness for a while about whether or not his little trick was responsible for this mess, then visited the room Constantine had suggested. The Doctor was starting to figure out the possible problem, but there was still something missing. Something was rewriting human DNA and spreading, but he couldn’t figure out what it was just yet. He thought it might be a virus, but he couldn’t recall anything like that coming from the Chula.

They were chased through the hospital then and ended up having to lock themselves in a small storage room. The Doctor was getting a bit annoyed by this pretty boy who seemed to have attached himself to his soulmate, even if he was refusing to claim her for himself.

“So, where'd you pick this one up, then?” the Doctor asked, trying to act casual.

“Doctor,” Rose warned with a sigh.

“She was hanging from a barrage balloon, I had an invisible spaceship. I never stood a chance,” Jack explained.

“Okay. One, we've got to get out of here. Two, we can't get out of here. Have I missed anything?” the Doctor asked as he looked around the room for anything he could use.

“Yeah. Jack just disappeared,” Rose reported. “Are you angry with me?”

The Doctor closed his eyes and tried to calm down. “No, Rose. This is dangerous and I’m worried about you, so I’m frustrated, not angry.”

“Rose? Doctor? Can you hear me? I'm back on my ship,” Jack’s voice sounded from the radio on a desk. “Used the emergency teleport. Sorry I couldn't take you. It's security-keyed to my molecular structure. I'm working on it. Hang in there.”

“How're you speaking to us?” the Doctor asked. What he was doing was similar to what he’d seen the child do earlier and he was sure there was a connection.

“Om-Com. I can call anything with a speaker grill,” Jack replied.

“Now there's a coincidence,” the Doctor told him.

“What is?” Jack wondered.

“The child can Om-Com, too.”

“He can?” Rose asked.

“Anything with a speaker grill. Even the TARDIS phone,” the Doctor explained.

“What, you mean the child can phone us?” Rose reasoned.

“And I can hear you. Coming to find you. Coming to find you,” the child’s voice interrupted their conversation.

Jack had tried to block the child’s signal to the radio while he continued to work on his teleport. In the meantime, the Doctor tried to work on loosening the bars over the window with his sonic. He didn’t really see anything else to do while they waited. He hated waiting.

“What you doing?” Rose asked.

“Trying to set up a resonation pattern in the concrete, loosen the bars,” he explained.

“You don't think he's coming back, do you?” Rose realized.

“Wouldn't bet my life. Definitely not yours,” the Doctor told her.

“Why don't you trust him?” she wondered.

“Why do you?”

“He saved my life. Bloke-wise, that's up there with flossing. I trust him because he's like you. Except with dating and dancing,” she said.

He just about saw red then. Jack did what? Even in his century, where people were more sexually flexible, they usually respected boundaries with people who were marked. Unless Rose hadn’t told him. The question now was whether or not he would actually step in and make the claim that he knew she would accept, if only he had the courage.

“What?” she asked when he’d been staring for a moment.

“You just assume I'm,” he began.

“What?”

“You just assume that I don't dance,” he said.

“What, are you telling me you do dance?” she asked, clearly flirting back.

“Nine hundred years old, me. I've been around a bit. I think you can assume at some point I've danced.”

“Should I be jealous? Knowing that you were looking for me?” she wondered.

“Didn’t say it went any further than dancing. And I did want to be sure that I could sweep you off your feet when I found you. Problem?”

“Think you’re so impressive,” she teased. “Doesn't the universe implode or something if you dance?”

“Well, I've got the moves but I wouldn't want to boast,” he told her. It was clear that they were both insinuating more than just typical dancing, but he meant it when he said he’d never done more than that while waiting for her. He could have, but Time Lords generally considered themselves above all of that to begin with, so it wasn’t difficult to wait.

Rose turned up the volume on the music Jack had sent through the radio, then moved in front of him to wrap her arms around his shoulders.

“You've got the moves? Show me your moves,” she challenged. “The world doesn't end because the Doctor dances.”

He swayed with her for a moment, then grabbed her hand to switch to a proper dance hold. It occurred to him then, that Jack had said she was hanging from a barrage balloon earlier, and she hadn’t been acting like her hands were hurting her. He grasped her wrists and stopped dancing to examine her palms.

“Barrage balloon?” he asked.

“What?”

“You were hanging from a barrage balloon.”

“Oh, yeah. About two minutes after you left me. Thousands of feet above London, middle of a German air-raid, Union Jack all over my chest,” she explained.

“I've travelled with a lot of people, but you're setting new records for jeopardy friendly.”

“Is this you dancing? Because I've got notes,” she argued, clearly hoping for more when he promised to show her his moves.

“Hanging from a rope thousands feet above London. Not a cut, not a bruise.”

He’d figured it out then. It took a little more work to actually stop the nanogenes and save everyone, but they did it. And now he really was dancing with Rose in the TARDIS, waiting for Jack to realize that he was being rescued. It was wonderful having her in his arms, spinning her around the room. When he finally sent her off to bed and was going to show Jack to a room of his own, he took the opportunity to warn the other man off.

“What did she tell you? About her and I?” the Doctor asked him.

“Not much. Just that she was travelling with you,” Jack replied.

The Doctor stopped in the hallway and closed his eyes. It wasn’t really Jack’s fault, or Rose’s. He was the one holding back after all.

“I can see the way you two look at each other. I won’t get in the way, if that’s what the problem is, Doctor,” Jack assured him.

“It’s not just that, Jack. We’re soulmates,” he admitted and leaned against the wall.

“What? Why wouldn’t she say that?” Jack wondered.

“Because I’ve been holding back from her. She knows why and so far she’s letting me, but it’s getting harder all the time,” the Doctor told him.

“Why in the world would you hold back from your soulmate?” he asked.

“Because I’ll outlive her by centuries? Because I’m an old, broken soldier that will only hurt her? Because I could never be worthy of that precious angel? Take your pick, Jack.”

“She’s your match for a reason, Doctor. She’s your match because of all of those things, not in spite of them. You’re a lucky man, and I’m going to do everything I can to help you see that. Now, I’m guessing from the little sign on the door that says Jack, that this is my room. So I’ll see you in the morning, Doctor,” Jack told him and retreated for the night.

Despite the slightly awkward start to their friendship with Jack, he had been a great addition to their little team. He was bright, had great instincts, and seemed to genuinely care about both of them. Jack was also someone that Rose could talk to about things. She’d left all of her friends behind and needed a confidante. The Doctor tried not to listen when he’d walked past the open door to the media room where they were talking, but when he heard what they were talking about, he froze.

“It’s hard, you know. Word gets around that you’re marked and the boys all stay away. Doesn’t really make you feel attractive or anything, you know?” Rose told Jack.

“Yeah, I can see that.”

“Except this one boy, I guess he found out from someone what my mark said. I’d never talked with him before, and he approached me one day. So he said it. Run. It was weird, because it didn’t mean anything. We didn’t run, there was no reason to run, he’d just said it. I guess I wanted to believe it. I let myself get pulled in by it,” she admitted.

“What happened?” Jack asked.

“We dated for a bit, but whenever I asked to see his mark, he changed the topic. I dropped out of school, was working two jobs while he played in some stupid band. And I let him… as soon as our clothes were off, I asked to see his mark again, I needed to make sure. I think I already knew that he didn’t have a mark, but it felt so good just to finally be wanted by someone. There was no mark of course. He was rough with me and it was awful. After that, I moved back with my mum and had to admit that it had been a huge mistake,” Rose told Jack.

“Rose, if you hadn’t had a mark, the same thing could have happened and you wouldn’t have had the reassurance that he’d been trying to trick you the whole time. It’s ok, the Doctor won’t blame you for it,” Jack said.

“But I’m damaged goods. What if he can see it? That I’m not good enough for him and that’s why he doesn’t want me?” Rose asked and the Doctor felt his hearts break just a little bit more.

“Rose, in my time, they’ve done hundreds of studies on soulmates. Trying to figure out how it works, why it’s always right when so many people try to fight it. We still don’t understand where it comes from, but I promise you that you and the Doctor are absolutely meant to be together. Everyone is a little bit broken, but you can heal each other, Rose,” he assured her.

“Thanks Jack.”

“You haven’t told him about any of that, have you?”

“Are you kidding me? You’ve seen how he is. If I told the Doctor about Jimmy, he’d go back in time and beat the shit out of him!” Rose argued.

She wasn’t wrong either. The Doctor stood frozen in the hallway as he listened, seething about the dumb bastard that had dared to take advantage of his Rose. He had half a mind to go back and find him anyway, even if it was clear that Rose didn’t want him to know about it. He promised himself then, that he would try to make sure that Rose felt beautiful and appreciated, the way others had never done for her because she had been marked for him. He wasn’t sure how to do that without giving in, but he was a genius, he would figure out something.

At least, that was what he told himself. There wasn’t actually any time for him to show her much of anything after that. Just after their next trip, they’d all been transmatted out of the TARDIS and into some stupid games on a space station. He and Jack had managed to escape their games, but by the time they’d located Rose, it was too late.

Now he was sitting in a jail cell with Jack and some overly flirtatious girl named Lynda that he’d rescued from the games. Satellite Five had gone to hell after he’d left the last time and Rose had been vapourized by the Anne Droid. It was all his fault and he couldn’t figure out why he still remembered Susan and the paradox of her existence being wiped out hadn’t ripped the universe apart yet. He and Jack escaped easily and made their way up to the main control room.

That was where they started to work out the problems, and where Jack had discovered that the ‘disintegration’ beams were actually transmats, taking people away. Rose was alive. He just had to find her. To do that, he had to shut down the camouflage of the ones the Controller called her masters.

“Hiding whatever's out there. Hiding it from sonar, radar, scanner. There's something sitting right on top of planet Earth, but it's completely invisible. If I cancel the signal,” he explained.

But as soon as the signal was shut down, he was faced with his worst nightmare since the war. And they had Rose.

“That's impossible. I know those ships. They were destroyed,” Jack argued.

“Obviously, they survived,” the Doctor seethed.

“Who did? Who are they?” Lynda questioned.

“Two hundred ships. More than two thousand on board each one. That's just about half a million of them,” the Doctor calculated.

“Half a million what?” one of the workers named Pavale asked.

“Daleks.”

He talked to them then. Saw his precious Rose cowering on the floor of the Daleks’ ship and promised her that he was going to rescue her. He and Jack used the extrapolator that they got from the last surviving Slitheen on Earth a little while back, to make a shield, then materialized right around Rose. There was only one Dalek close enough to her that it ended up inside the ship with them, but the gun Jack had picked up along the way dealt with that quickly.

The Doctor was in front of Rose in an instant and quickly scooped her into a bone crushing hug. He thought he’d lost her forever. Of course, getting her off their ship didn’t stop them. They went back to Satellite Five, but fighting half a million Daleks one by one with bullets wasn’t going to solve the problem. The only solution he could come up with was to use the station’s transmitter to create a Delta Wave. It would wipe out all the humans on Earth along with the Daleks, but they were already past the point of humans leaving the solar system for other colonies. The race would survive. But no one on the station would and he couldn’t do that to Rose. He tricked her into the TARDIS and activated emergency program one to send her home. The Doctor had recorded a message to play for her in case something like this happened. He just hoped she would understand and forgive him.

He had recorded it just a week ago, while she was sleeping.

_ This is Emergency Programme One. Rose, now listen, this is important. If this message is activated, then it can only mean one thing. We must be in danger. And I mean fatal. I'm dead or about to die any second with no chance of escape. And that's okay. Hope it's a good death. But I promised to look after you, and that's what I'm doing. The TARDIS is taking you home. And I bet you're fussing and moaning now. Typical. But hold on and just listen a bit more. The TARDIS can never return for me. Emergency Programme One means I'm facing an enemy that should never get their hands on this machine. But, there’s still a chance, Rose. Time Lords have a little trick called regeneration. If we’re about to die, energy from within us allows our body to reform again. I might look and sound completely different, but if it happens and I don’t die completely, then I’ll find you. I’ll get my hands on a vortex manipulator like Jack’s and come back for you. If that doesn’t happen, then I need you to do just one thing for me, Rose. That's all, one thing. Have a good life. Do that for me, Rose. Have a fantastic life.  _

So, as he was sitting on the floor of Satellite Five, twisting wires together and wondering where it all went wrong, he thought of her beautiful smile and all the things that could have been had he just gotten his head out of his arse and taken her advice. She had wanted to build something with him that he could cherish after she’d gone, but now he was the one that would die first and all she would remember was how miserable he was.

The Daleks made it to him then and dared him to use the Delta Wave.

“Then prove yourself, Doctor. What are you, coward or killer?” the Emperor demanded via the viewscreen from his ship.

The Doctor tried to make himself press the switch, but he couldn’t. “Coward. Any day.”

“Mankind will be harvested because of your weakness.”

“And what about me? Am I becoming one of your angels?” the Doctor asked.

“You are the heathen. You will be exterminated.” the Emperor demanded and the Daleks on board the station moved into position to fire.

“Maybe it's time,” he sighed.

Then the TARDIS materialized behind him and Rose emerged, bathed in the light of the Time Vortex. He had never seen anything more beautiful or more terrifying. She told him that she was the one to spread the Bad Wolf messages to lead herself back to him. To keep him safe. When the Daleks tried to exterminate her, she dissolved all of them into dust.

Once all of the ships were gone, the Doctor insisted, “Rose, you've done it. Now stop. Just let go.”

“How can I let go of this? I bring life,” she gasped.

He felt something very wrong happen then, but wasn’t sure what it was. For now he just had to save Rose. 

“But this is wrong! You can't control life and death.”

“But I can. The sun and the moon, the day and night. But why do they hurt?” she told him, golden tears streaking down her face.

“The power's going to kill you and it's my fault,” he cursed.

“I can see everything. All that is, all that was, all that ever could be.”

“That's what I see. All the time. And doesn't it drive you mad?” he asked.

“My head,” she cried.

“Come here,” he told her, pulling her into his arms.

“It's killing me.”

“I think you need a Doctor,” he said and kissed her. 

She had been willing to give up everything to keep him safe. The least he could give her was a regeneration. He absorbed all of the power from her mind and fed it back into the TARDIS. Once that was done, he picked her up and carried her back into his ship.

As he was about to leave, he saw Jack running towards the ship. He could feel now just what Rose had done with her power to bring life, and far too much of it. The Doctor was about to regenerate and being in close proximity to a living, breathing fixed point in time would be sure to make a mess of things for him. He started the engines and flew them away from Satellite Five.

“What happened?” Rose asked when she woke up on the floor.

“Don't you remember?” he questioned. Perhaps it was all too much for her mind to retain it.

“It's like there was this singing,” she told him, clearly confused.

“That's right. I sang a song and the Daleks ran away,” he teased.

“I was at home. No, I wasn't, I was in the TARDIS, and there was this light. I can't remember anything else,” she admitted.

He could see the golden light starting to shine on his hand. He would regenerate soon and he needed to make sure that Rose knew what was happening.

“Rose Tyler. I was going take you to so many places. Barcelona. Not the city Barcelona, the planet Barcelona. You'd love it. Fantastic place. They've got dogs with no noses. Imagine how many times a day you end up telling that joke, and it's still funny,” he said.

“Then, why can't we go?” she asked.

“Maybe you will, and maybe I will. But not like this,” he told her.

“Does this have anything to do with what you said in that message? Something about reforming and looking different?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I absorbed all the energy of the Time Vortex, and no one's meant to do that. Every cell in my body's dying.”

“Can't you do something?”

“Yeah, I'm doing it now. You have to stay back while I’m regenerating. Time Lords have this little trick, it's sort of a way of cheating death. Except it means I'm going to change, and I'm not going to see you again. Not like this. Not with this daft old face. And before I go.”

“Don't say that,” she interrupted with tears in her eyes.

“Rose, before I go, I just want to tell you, you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And do you know what? So was I,” he said just before he burst into golden light and changed just for her.

He had known some Time Lords to choose how they would look during this process. He had never tried it before, but with Rose here… Younger, prettier, maybe sound more like her too. The pain subsided and he felt his clothes hanging off of him now. Everything felt a bit odd.

“Hello. Okay. Ooo, new teeth. That's weird. So, where was I? Oh, that's right. Barcelona,” he said and grinned at his Rose.

  
  
  
  



	5. Five

The Doctor could feel Rose’s eyes on him as he adjusted the coordinates. He hadn’t been to Barcelona in ages, but knew that she’d love it there. Nice warm beaches, delicious ice cream, and he could take her to see the fireworks at their annual festival in the capital city.

“6 PM... Tuesday… October... 5006... On the way to Barcelona!” he announced, then turned to address her. “Now then... what do I look like? No, no no, no no no no no no no. No. Don't tell me. Let's see... two legs, two arms, two hands… Slight weakness in the dorsal tubercle. Hair! I'm not bald! Oh, Oh! Big hair! Sideburns, I've got sideburns! Or really bad skin. Little bit thinner… That's weird. Give me time, I'll get used to it. I... have got... a mole. I can feel it. Between my shoulder blades, there's a mole. That's all right. Love the mole.”

He knew he was rambling a bit, maybe it was nerves regarding what his soulmate would think of his new form. She looked to be in shock despite the warnings he had managed to give her about the process, but he supposed that there really wasn’t any way for her to understand what was going to happen until she saw it for herself. So he tried to reassure her with a grin.

“Go on then, tell me. What do you think?” he asked as he stood before her with ruffled hair and a too big leather jacket.

“Doctor? Is it really you? You’re not just some other person that replaced him or something?” she asked worriedly.

“Of course it’s me, Rose. You saw me, I, I changed… right in front of you.”

She still looked unsure, so he knew the only physical thing that hadn’t changed through all of his regenerations was his soulmark.

“Rose, it's me. Honestly, it's me. I was dying. To save my own life I changed my body. Every single cell, but... it's still me,” he insisted.

“You can't be,” she whispered as tear-filled eyes searched his.

“Then how could I remember this? Very first word I ever said to you. Trapped in that cellar. Surrounded by shop window dummies.... Oh… such a long time ago. I took your hand,” he told her as he gripped her hand in his own just as he had when they met. “I said one word... just one word, I said... Run.”

He traced his fingers over the spot on her arm where he knew that word was written, then pulled back his sleeve to reveal the first words she said to him etched into his skin. She looked down and traced over the letters with her finger before looking back into his eyes.

“Doctor,” she gasped.

“Hello,” he said with another grin.

He knew he had her convinced then, but she wanted to check in with her mother after the way she had left to save him. And something went terribly wrong with his change after that. He managed to land them on Earth, near Rose’s mum, but then fell into a healing coma.

He slipped in and out of consciousness. There were voices and pyjamas, he felt sweaty but chilled at the same time. The Doctor could vaguely hear Rose calling, “Doctor, wake up!”

He felt his sonic screwdriver pressed into his hand, but he couldn’t quite summon the strength to grasp it until he heard her voice in his ear, “Help me.”

That was all it took. She needed him, so he pushed everything aside and forced his way back to consciousness. His mind fought against it, needing more time to reconnect vital synapses, but none of it would do any good in a universe without her, so all of that would wait until she was safe. He pointed the sonic towards the menacing thing that had blasted through the wall and shut it down.

A quick analysis of the situation told him that something had sent a device that looked like a Christmas tree to attack them while he was vulnerable. Jackie and Mickey were huddled in the corner of the room furthest from the door and Rose was holding onto his arm.

“Remote control. But who's controlling it?” he pondered as he got up from the bed and pulled on the nearby robe before following the signal outside.

He managed to work out that the robots controlling the tree were themselves being controlled by something else, something far more dangerous, but the best he could do was call them pilot fish before falling unconscious yet again. His fever got worse and one of his hearts kept stopping and starting as his body fought its way back from near death into this new form. Through it all, he could feel her presence next to him. She was always there with cool cloths and he could sense her worry for him.

The Doctor was floating upward, nearly ready to wake up, when he heard Mickey’s voice.

“The proper Doctor wouldn’t do this, would he? He’d be out there saving us all, not sleeping away while aliens take over the world,” Mickey grumbled.

“Stop it! You see this?” Rose argued, and he could feel her hand in his as she stroked her fingers over his soul mark. “He’s had this mark for centuries! Waiting and searching for me all that time. And I’m not giving up on him now.” 

He relaxed then. Knowing that she still believed in him gave him that bit of confidence to get through this and back to his wonderful life with her. It was some time later, though he couldn’t really keep track of it, that he had a sudden influx of free radicals. He took a deep breath of the steam and suddenly opened his eyes. 

The Doctor was back on the TARDIS, but he seemed to be alone on the floor. There was a thermos of tea nearby that had been the source of the very helpful steam and he quickly picked it up to drain its contents in one gulp. Oh, that was just what he needed. In a flash, he was at the monitor and looking to see what was outside of the TARDIS.

He quickly noted that Rose and Mickey were there with a group of other humans, facing down a ship full of Sycorax. That wasn’t good, he’d best get out there to help. He noted that the humans had just realized that the translation circuits were back online, so that was his cue for a grand entrance.

“If I can hear English, then it's being translated. Which means it's working. Which means,” Rose reasoned and turned back towards the TARDIS.

The Doctor opened the doors and smiled at his brilliant girl. “Did you miss me?” he asked.

There were introductions and arguments and a bit of a sword fight, but in the end, he got an amazing hug from Rose and she kissed his cheek as he spun her around. They were back on Earth and the ship was leaving, having lost their commanding officer. All in all, it was a pretty good day.

Until of course, Harriet Jones ordered the destruction of the retreating Sycorax ship. He hoped that wouldn’t spark retaliation from their homeworld, but all he could really do for the moment was to plant the spark of doubt about Harriet Jones that would ultimately be her downfall.

They went back to Jackie’s flat, but he sent Rose up ahead of him so that he could stop in at the TARDIS and change into something more presentable than pyjamas.

While he searched the wardrobe room for something that felt right for his new form, he considered what had happened. Rose had done something that should have been impossible. She should never have survived exposure to the heart of the TARDIS like that. As soon as he got her back on the ship, he needed to check her over in the medbay for any lasting side effects.

The slim fitting brown suit and long coat that he wore to dinner in Jackie’s flat seemed to meet Rose’s approval. He caught her looking him over more than once and winked at her, making her blush.

As they stood outside later that evening, staring up at the wreckage from the Sycorax ship burning up in the atmosphere, he took her hand in his and swore to himself that he would be better for her.

“This is a brand new planet Earth. No denying the existence of aliens now. Everyone saw it. Everything's new,” he said.

“And what about you? What are you going to do next?” Rose asked, her insecurities still making her question whether he would keep her with him.

“Well, back to the TARDIS. Same old life,” he said, squeezing her hand.

“On your own?”

“No, Rose. Of course not,” he assured her.

“I thought, because you changed you might not want me anymore,” she admitted.

“After spending centuries searching all of time and space for you? I could never just leave you behind,” the Doctor insisted.

“Well, I reckon you're mad, the pair of you. It's like you go looking for trouble,” Jackie complained.

“Trouble's just the bits in-between. It's all waiting out there, Jackie, and it's brand new to me. All those planets, and creatures and horizons. I haven't seen them yet! Not with these eyes. And it is going to be fantastic,” he told them with a broad grin.

They went back into the ship after that, Rose telling her mother that she couldn’t sleep anywhere else now. But once they’d gotten inside, he led her down the hall to the medbay rather than her room.

“Why are we here? Are you still sick, Doctor?” she asked.

“No, Rose, I’m just fine and dandy now. But, what you did when you came back to me shouldn’t have been possible. I’m sure that you feel fine considering everything that you’ve done since then, but I just need to check that there aren’t any hidden side effects from it,” he rambled as he pulled various gadgets from the drawers and shelves to scan her with.

“What did I do exactly? I don’t remember what happened,” she told him, hopping up on the nearby bed.

He stood in front of her and grasped her upper arms. It was vitally important that she understood that she could never do that again. She wouldn’t know what not to do if he didn’t explain it. With a sigh, he tried to calm his panic at even thinking about what had happened.

“I don’t know exactly how you managed it, Rose, but you opened the heart of the TARDIS, just like Blon did in Cardiff. You looked into the light and absorbed the Time Vortex. Together with the TARDIS, you came back to the Game Station to save me. You spread the Bad Wolf messages throughout time and dissolved all of the Daleks into subatomic particles. The power was burning through your mind and I had to take it from you to return it to the ship,” he explained.

“But- that means, you died because of me,” she gasped, tears filling her eyes.

“Rose, I would have died if you hadn’t come back. Possibly without regenerating. You are more than worth it. But you can never do that again, please. Please promise me, Rose.”

She nodded and wrung her hands together as he went about scanning her with just about every test he could think of. It would take a few hours for the results to be calculated, so he sent her off to bed with a hug and a kiss to the top of her head.

While waiting, he pondered what had happened with Jack and just what to do about it. He was their friend, and while he had no choice but to leave in that moment, they could go back for him. It would grate on his time sense to be around him, but he could probably get used to it. Rose had needed a friend to confide in, especially with the way he’d been acting. The Doctor would have to be honest with her first and explain why he had to leave Jack behind to begin with, but he worried a bit about her blaming herself for that as well. Rose was so strong and brave despite everything that she had been through in her life, maybe because of it.

The computer nearby beeped to tell him that one of the scans had completed its analysis, and he rolled his chair over to the monitor. What he saw was certainly not what he had expected. He was hoping that he was just being overcautious and there wouldn’t be anything unusual at all. But somehow, Rose’s genetic structure had been fundamentally altered. Of course, if she could see all that is, was, and could be, and had the power to make Jack immortal, she wouldn’t have left her own fate out of the equation. The question was, what had she done to herself while she was Bad Wolf?

The Doctor spent the rest of the night pouring over all of the data to figure out just how much she was changed now. So when Rose found him in the medbay the next morning, he was surrounded by dozens of papers filled with the circles and lines of his language and his hair in disarray from running his hands through it.

“Doctor?” she said, trying to pull his attention away from the screen. He didn’t respond so she placed a hand on his shoulder, and he turned to face her suddenly.

“Rose!” he gasped and hugged her tightly around the waist from his seat.

“What’s all this then? Am I dying?” she joked.

“No. And you won’t for a very long time now,” he told her.

“What do you mean?”

“You did a lot more than just destroy the Daleks, Rose. Let’s go discuss this over breakfast,” he suggested.

She took the news of the changes in her physiology quite well, obviously feeling that the fact that she didn’t seem to be aging at all at this point and would heal much more quickly from injuries should be a wonderful thing with regards to their relationship. But, as expected, she seemed devastatingly guilty about what she had done to Jack.

“We have to go back and find him, Doctor. He won’t know what happened,” she insisted.

“I’ll try, Rose. I’m not sure if the TARDIS will let me get very close to when we left. And he did have his vortex manipulator. If he thought that we were gone, he might have left as well,” the Doctor told her as they walked to the console room.

He was checking coordinates to calculate just where they should go, when he felt a nudge from his psychic paper. Pulling the leather wallet from his pocket, he saw a message and showed it to Rose. There were time and space coordinates as well as saying, ‘Ward 26, please come.’

“Do you know who it’s from?” she wondered.

“No idea, but we’d better check it out,” he sighed and changed where they were going to find whomever this was.

When they exited the TARDIS, they were standing on a grassy hill overlooking the city. He took a deep breath of the brisk wind coming off of the water and started to explain where they were. 

“It's the year five billion and twenty three. We're in the galaxy M87, and this? This is New Earth.”

“That's just. That's just,” Rose stammered, taking a hold of his arm as she marvelled at their surroundings.

“Not bad. Not bad at all,” he said with a smile.

“That's amazing. I'll never get used to this. Never. Different ground beneath my feet,” she laughed and jumped up and down. “Different sky. What's that smell?”

“Apple grass,” he said as he picked a few pieces to hold closer to her nose.

“Apple grass,” she groaned as she took in the scent more deeply.

“Yeah, yeah.”

“It's beautiful. Oh, I love this. Can I just say, travelling with you, I love it,” she told him, looking up into his eyes.

“Me too. Come on,” he said with a smile and pulled her down the hill where they could relax without sliding into the nearby water.

He spread out his long coat on the grass and laid down with her sitting on the coat next to him. He really did love travelling with her. Rose was everything that he could ever hope for, and she was his soulmate. Now he just had to figure out how to stop pushing her away. She wouldn’t leave him in a few decades as he had always feared, there was no reason not to move forward with their relationship. He just wasn’t sure how.

“So, the year five billion, the sun expands, the Earth gets roasted,” he began to explain.

“That was our first date,” she interjected, grinning at him.

“We had chips,” he agreed, looking up at her like a lovesick schoolboy. “So anyway, planet gone, all rocks and dust, but the human race lives on, spread out across the stars. Soon as the Earth burns up, oh yeah, they get all nostalgic, big revival movement, but then find this place. Same size as the Earth, same air, same orbit. Lovely. Call goes out, the humans move in.”

“What's the city called?” she asked.

“New New York.”

“Oh, come on,” she grumbled, sure he was teasing her.

“It is,” he insisted. “It's the city of New New York. Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New New New New New New New New New New New New New New York. What?”

“You're so different,” she said as she looked at him fondly.

“New New Doctor,” he replied teasingly. 

He hoped that she liked the ways he was different now. While regenerating, he had tried to become a better match for her, but he couldn’t be sure yet if he had managed it.

They made their way to the hospital to find the person that had called them to Ward 26, but got separated at the lifts. Once she finally found her way there, he knew something was wrong. While she may have just gotten sick of waiting for him to get his head out of his arse, the kiss seemed a bit too forceful for her. When he tested his theory by asking her about computer systems she should have no knowledge of, he knew something was terribly wrong.

The Doctor managed to save them all, plus free the new humans from the experiments that had been run by the hospital staff. Now he had to deal with the Face of Boe, who had called them to begin with, and Cassandra, who was still inhabiting Rose’s mind.

“You were supposed to be dying,” the Doctor said to the Face of Boe.

“There are better things to do today. Dying can wait,” the large head in a jar replied telepathically.

“Oh, I hate telepathy. Just what I need, a head full of big face,” Cassandra moaned from Rose’s mouth.

The Doctor hushed her for now, needing to find out what the Face of Boe wanted to tell them.

“I have grown tired with the universe, Doctor, but you have taught me to look at it anew.”

“There are legends, you know, saying that you're millions of years old,” the Doctor said.

“There are? That would be impossible,” Boe replied enigmatically.

“Wouldn't it just. I got the impression there was something you wanted to tell me,” he prompted.

“There are a great many things that I will tell you over time. For the moment, my message is for both you and your flower,” the Face of Boe told him. “Your friend is where he needs to be, you need not go looking for him just yet.”

“Do you mean Jack?” the Doctor wondered, sure that had Rose been herself, she would be demanding to know more than that.

“She saw what must be. We shall meet again, Doctor. Until that day,” he said and teleported away in a flash of blue light.

Cassandra left Rose’s body, inhabiting that of her short-lived clone servant. The Doctor was glad that he didn’t have to force Cassandra out. He was worried that he might damage Rose’s mind even more in the process. But in the end, Cassandra decided that it was her time to die after all.

“How are you feeling?” he asked Rose once they were alone again in the TARDIS.

“Bit of a headache, but I think I’m alright,” she told him.

“Would you, that is, I just,” he struggled with how to ask her what he needed to do.

“You want to do some scans or something?” she guessed.

“Yes, well, not exactly,” he sighed, sitting on the jump seat. “I’ve told you before that I could sense in my mind if there were any other Time Lords. My people were telepathic. I’d like, if you’ll let me, to check your mind for any damage from the psychograft.”

“So, you’d go in my head like she did and look around or something?”

“Not exactly. I wouldn’t be taking over your mind the way she did. She barged in and took over, pushing your consciousness aside. It would be more like me entering the room and taking a look around while you’re still completely yourself,” he explained.

“Um, alright, I guess that’s ok,” she said, a bit nervously.

He nodded and switched places with her, so she was seated on the jump seat and he stood directly in front of her. The Doctor placed his fingertips on her temples and both closed their eyes as he made contact. He could see that her mind was tired and strained from the attack, but there didn’t appear to be any lasting damage. While there, he searched for any sign of what Bad Wolf may have done to her mind. He was distracted however by the running commentary of Rose’s thoughts as he looked around.

_ ‘Can he see all my thoughts? What if he sees how much I love him and sends me away? Is he angry about that kiss? It wasn’t my fault. Maybe I should have fought harder against her. What if he knows everything about me now? He’ll see what happened with Jimmy and-’ _

The Doctor disconnected from her mind and pulled her into a hug. How could she be so strong and brave, but also so insecure at the same time. It was his fault really, for not accepting her immediately when they met. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered into her hair. “I’ll never send you away. I’m sorry that I ever made you feel less than the beautiful, perfect person that you are.”

Rose looked up at him with wide eyes and he held her face in his hands as he kissed her softly. Her lips were soft and warm. He could feel her trembling and not kissing him back, but he didn’t really expect her to. When he released her, her eyes were closed, a look of bliss on her face that he hoped he could recreate again and again. For the moment, he left the console room and went to have a shower after everything that had happened in the hospital.


	6. Six

The Doctor tried, he really tried to show Rose that he was moving forward with their relationship. He wanted to take her on a proper date. He planned on going to a concert with her, then maybe stargazing or something, but of course, they’d ended up being chased by a werewolf and banished by Queen Victoria. It seemed like nothing would go right in his plans to finally get on with it.

When they met up with Sarah Jane, he could see Rose’s insecurities take over again, curling in on herself and stepping back from him as he reminisced with his old friend. He was working on fixing K-9 with Sarah Jane, while Rose and Mickey chatted at a nearby table.

“I thought of you on Christmas Day. This Christmas just gone? Great big spaceship overhead. I thought, oh yeah, bet he's up there,” Sarah Jane said.

“Right on top of it, yeah.”

“And Rose?”

“She was there too,” he said as he focused on twisting the bits of wire back together.

“You told me once that you had a soulmark. Did you ever find her, Doctor?” Sarah Jane asked as she looked between he and Rose.

“Yes. And yes she is. Your instincts haven’t changed,” he sighed.

“Oh, Doctor. What are you going to do?” she asked, remembering just how worried he was about his soulmate aging and leaving him. Having aged herself since seeing him, she understood all too well now just what that meant for him.

“She, well, that is to say, Rose did something not too long ago. She looked into the heart of the TARDIS to save me and changed herself in the process. She’s not aging anymore. I won’t lose her that way,” he told her.

“Oh, Doctor that’s wonderful for you. So why does she seem so worried about meeting me? It’s like she’s afraid you’ll choose me over her or something,” Sarah Jane wondered.

He closed his eyes and admitted that he had been holding back from her and didn’t know how to stop pushing her away anymore. Now that he knew his hearts wouldn’t be broken all too soon, he wanted to change things but hadn’t managed to show her yet.

“Talk to her. Tell her how you’re feeling, how you’ve changed your mind and what you want with her now. She’ll understand, Doctor,” she assured him.

“I’ll try,” he grumbled.

There was an uncomfortable silence between them for a few moments as each considered what to say next.

“It wasn't Croydon. Where you dropped me off, that wasn't Croydon,” Sarah Jane said suddenly.

“Where was it?”

“Aberdeen.”

“Right. That's next to Croydon, isn't it?” he asked, prompting laughter from his old friend.

Mickey wanted to travel with them after it was all over, but Sarah Jane suggested that she introduce him to the Brigadier at UNIT instead. She knew that the struggling couple needed some time to work things out for themselves and Mickey would make that awkward.

The Doctor tried taking her to various balls around the galaxy, picnics in beautiful, secluded locations, but every time they ended up embroiled in some kind of conflict and running for their lives. Deciding to give Earth another chance after their failed attempt at the Ian Dury concert. This time, he would aim for the 1950s and take her to see Elvis.

The pink dress that Rose was wearing left him speechless. She walked through the console room and stepped outside into the sunshine while waiting for him. He flicked a few controls so the TARDIS would move his scooter out to the console room to surprise her, then poked his head out the door to talk with her.

“I thought we'd be going for the Vegas era, you know the white flares and the, grr, chest hair,” Rose teased as she spun happily in her little pink heels to make her skirt flare.

“You are kidding, aren't you? You want to see Elvis, you go for the late fifties. The time before burgers. When they called him the Pelvis and he still had a waist. What's more, you see him in style,” he replied and quickly pulled on his helmet and shades before riding the scooter out the door.

He looked back at her over his shoulder and put on his best Elvis impression, “You going my way, doll?”

“Is there any other way to go, daddy-o? Straight from the fridge, man,” Rose laughed as she put on her sunglasses and climbed on the back of the scooter, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

“Hey, you speak the lingo.”

“Oh well, me mum, Cliff Richard movies every Bank Holiday Monday,” she explained, putting on the pink helmet he’d brought for her.

“Ah, Cliff. I knew your mother'd be a Cliff fan,” he sighed.

He started driving down the street to get his bearings on which way they should be heading and enjoyed the feeling of Rose holding onto him.

“Where we off to?” she asked.

“Ed Sullivan TV Studios. Elvis did Hound Dog on one of the shows. There were loads of complaints. Bit of luck, we'll just catch it,” he told her.

“And that'll be TV studios in, what, New York?” she questioned.

“That's the one,” he agreed.

He pulled to a stop at the end of the street when a red double decker bus drove by. There were strings of Union Flag bunting everywhere and the Doctor wondered how he could have botched the landing so badly again.

“Ha! Digging that New York vibe,” Rose laughed.

“Well, this could still be New York. I mean, this looks very New York to me. Sort of Londony New York, mind,” he admitted.

I was time for Elizabeth II’s coronation and something strange was going on, of course. Their investigation was going fairly well, he thought. Rose was checking things from the relative safety of the Connolly’s house and he was with the police to find out what they knew about the situation.

“We started finding them about a month ago. Persons left sans visage. Heads just blank,” Bishop explained as the Doctor looked over their maps and files.

“Is there any sort of pattern?” he asked.

“Yes, spreading out from North London. All over the city. Men, women, kids, grannies. The only real lead is there's been quite a large number in,” the Detective Inspector began.

“Florizel Street,” the Doctor interjected as he noticed the concentration in their data.

“Found another one, sir,” an officer announced as he led someone into the room with a large blanket over their head.

The Doctor’s hearts began to race as he noticed the familiar shoes and bottom of her dress. It couldn’t be. But it would be so like her to have stumbled right into the heart of the problem.

“Oh, er, good man, Crabtree. Here we are, Doctor. Take a good look. See what you can deduce,” Bishop said, oblivious to the state the Doctor was suddenly in.

The blanket was removed and he stared disbelievingly at his soulmate’s blank face. He would fix this.

“Rose,” he whispered, reaching out to stroke her cheek, but afraid to touch her and make this all too real.

“You know her?” Bishop asked.

“Know her? She’s-”

“They found her in the street, apparently, down by Damascus Road. Just abandoned,” the officer explained.

“That's unusual. That's the first one out in the open. Heaven help us if something happens in public tomorrow for the big day. We'll have Torchwood on our backs then, make no mistake,” Detective Inspector Bishop replied.

“They did what?” the Doctor asked as he almost processed what he heard them saying behind him.

“I'm sorry?” Bishop asked.

“They left her where?”

“Just in the street.”

“In the street,” he growled. “They left her in the street. They took her face and just chucked her out and left her in the street. And as a result, that makes things simple. Very, very simple. Do you know why?”

“No,” Bishop responded.

“Because now, Detective Inspector Bishop, there is no power on this Earth that can stop me. Come on!” the Doctor shouted.

He left Rose at the police station. She would be as safe there as she could be for the moment and brought Bishop with him back to where Rose had been found. 

The Doctor realized quickly that Rose had noticed the odd things out from the very beginning. All the television antennas and extra tvs everywhere. It was in Magpie’s shop that he found the source of the problem and with Tommy Connelly’s help, stopped the Wire from devouring the minds of thousands of people.

His hearts soared when he saw Rose back to normal and spun her around happily when she leapt into his arms. It was time, he decided to take Sarah Jane’s advice. They needed to talk. When the street party had settled down and they were alone in the TARDIS once again, he took her hand and led her to the library.

They sat on the couch together and he looked at her for several minutes as he tried to think about where to start. He gave up after a bit and just hugged her tightly again. Rose returned the hug happily.

“Are you alright, Doctor?” she asked.

“I am now,” he replied and released her to sit back and face her for the conversation that was long overdue. “I’ve been trying so hard to change things between us, but trouble always seems to find us and get in the way.”

“Change things how?” she questioned nervously.

“Oh, Rose. I’m so sorry. From the moment I met you, no, long before I ever found you, I have been making this so much more difficult for us than it ever needed to be. As soon as I realized that my soulmate was probably human, I worried how I would ever survive knowing that I’d only get a few decades before you left me alone again. It seemed like some kind of torture for fate to taunt me with the perfect match only to take her away too soon. And I let those fears ruin the start of our lives together,” he told her.

“You didn’t ruin it, Doctor. It’s maybe been harder than it could have been,” Rose interrupted.

“But that’s just it, Rose. You’ve been hurt by it. You’ve felt inadequate, worried that you weren’t good enough, or smart enough, whatever enough, when you are everything to me. I’ve been horrible, always pushing you away. And it’s completely unfair of me to only have been ready to move forward in our relationship after you changed yourself to live as long as me. I should have accepted from the start your argument that even if we only had a few days together, we could build something that was worth remembering without regrets. I’ve been selfish from the start and I’m so very sorry for that. Can you forgive me?”

“Of course, Doctor. You’re stuck with me,” she said with a smile.

“Oh thank you,” he sighed in relief. “I love you, Rose. I’ve loved you from nearly the beginning and would have even without the soulmarks. You’re brilliant, brave, beautiful, kind, patient, and stubborn enough to deal with me. I’ve learned a few things about you that you’re not proud of, but it’s ok. I could give you centuries worth of things that I’ve done that I’m not proud of. Don’t you dare call yourself damaged goods ever again.”

Rose gasped as she realized that he must have overheard her conversation with Jack about Jimmy. He knew that she had-

“Stop,” he insisted, taking her hands in his. “It’s past. And it wasn’t your fault. And I hope that you’ll never feel undesirable again for the rest of your life. Because I intend to show you just how much I desire you every single day from now on.”

“I love you too, Doctor,” she told him through happy tears.

He kissed her then, his tongue seeking out hers, their fingers combing through each other’s hair as hands roamed to areas they’d never been brave enough to touch before. Rose moaned into his mouth and climbed over to straddle his lap and get as close as she possibly could on the couch.

The Doctor squeezed her bum and pulled her against his erection, giving them both some much needed friction. Rose grabbed fistfuls of his hair as she snogged him, both of them gasping for air before long. His respiratory bypass should have kicked in, negating his need to breathe for hours, but he was so focused on her that he couldn’t be bothered to think about that.

Rose pulled off the little jacket she wore over her dress and fumbled to find the zipper on the side of the bodice. Not quite wanting her to take off the dress just yet, he lifted her off his lap and back on the sofa, kneeling in front of her with a filthy smirk.

“What are you-? Oh!” Rose gasped when he reached beneath the layers of tulle to remove her pantyhose and knickers. He tossed them, along with her shoes, across the room and dove under her skirt to fulfill the fantasy he’d dreamed up the minute he saw her in this outfit.

The Doctor pushed her legs further apart and tugged her hips forward a bit to give him better access. He had never done this before, of course, but had done a fair amount of reading on the topic. And, though he’d never admit it to anyone, since having met Rose, he’d watched a few videos (strictly for research of course). He paid careful attention to her responses to everything he did, adjusting firmness and speed as best he could, but there was bound to be a learning curve for both of them. Her folds were wet and blazing hot compared to his cooler body temperature, but she seemed to enjoy the difference as he stroked her gently. Starting with one finger inside of her, he moved it in and out gently, the thumb of his other hand rubbing careful circles over her clitoris. He knew that he would be able to increase the speed and pressure later, but for now this was perfect.

Rose was moaning, calling his name, and unable to stop herself from writhing under his ministrations. He wanted to make sure that she had an orgasm before moving to something more mutual because, based on his strictly scientific research with the videos, he wouldn’t last long. At least until he got some practice.

When Rose started asking for more, he decided it was time for the next step and swirled his tongue around her clitoris the way his thumb had been doing. She shouted at the sudden change in sensations and he added a second finger inside of her. Her channel was trembling around him, her hands were trying to grasp his hair through the layers of her skirt and he took all of that as a sign. The Doctor curled his fingers against the rough patch inside of her and sucked harshly on her swollen clit. Rose shrieked and her whole body arched beneath him as her vaginal walls clenched around his fingers. The thought of how that would feel when he was inside her made his erection even harder in his tight trousers.

He lifted his head out from under her skirt and watched her flush face as she gasped for air. His hand found its way to rubbing himself through his trousers of its own volition and he considered just how far away his bedroom was and whether or not he could manage carrying her there, over his shoulder.

“Oh my god,” Rose gasped.

“Just think what I’ll be able to do with a little practice,” he preened.

“Where did you learn to do that?” she questioned.

“Research,” he said. “I’ve never actually tried any of it before.”

“Right. Your turn,” she said and dove to join him on the floor of the library.

Rose was trying to unfasten his trousers while he immediately moved to start kissing her again. When she reached into his pants and wrapped her hand around him, the Doctor fell back on the floor and groaned, unable to focus on anything but the incredible sensation of her touch. It was so much more intense and unpredictable than when he had touched himself. Added to that was the difference in their body temperatures, making her hand feel indescribable. 

When she suddenly took him into her mouth, he almost finished immediately, but fought to hold it back or she would stop what she was doing too soon. Encased in the wet heat of her mouth, he could almost imagine what it would be like when they had intercourse. There were so many things happening though. Her fingers were wrapped tightly around the base of his erection as she stroked him where her mouth couldn’t reach, her tongue swirled around the tip when she wasn’t creating the most unbelievable suction. As much as he fought it, he only managed to hold back for three minutes and forty eight seconds before he released into her mouth. Rose swallowed it, making a face as she considered whether the taste was pleasant or not, but she didn’t seem disgusted or upset.

“Sorry, should have warned you, but it took me a bit by surprise,” he said.

“It’s fine, Doctor. I’m glad you liked it,” she replied.

“Oh, Rose,” he sighed and immediately moved to resume their snogging.

They eventually made it to his bedroom and curled around each other before they both fell asleep, exhausted from everything that had happened with the Wire, but happy with their new found closeness. When he awoke four hours later, thoroughly rested, he let her sleep and started making plans.


	7. Seven

It took some time, searching for Jack, but he let the TARDIS help guide him through their friend’s timeline to a point after the game station, but where they hadn't met up with him again. He also knew that Jack would have an important role to play wherever he ended up and there would only be certain points where they could intersect with him.

What it meant was that they were landing in the middle of a war and while he wanted to get Jack out of that torture, he also wanted to keep Rose far away from there. He wondered if he could find Jack quickly enough to get out of there before Rose even knew they'd landed, but as he scanned the area for Jack’s unique readings, Rose strolled into the console room.

“So, what we doing today?” she asked.

“Jack,” he told her as he continued his scans.

“Jack? We're going to find Jack?” Rose gasped excitedly.

“We're going to rescue Jack,” he corrected.

“Rescue him from what?” 

“Passchendaele in late 1917,” he told her.

“Is that during World War One?” Rose asked, not completely sure of her history.

“Yes, nearing the end of the war. This is where the TARDIS led me to find him, so I've got to go get him out of here,” he explained. 

“Let's go then,” she urged, heading for the doors.

“Wait! Rose, it's literally a war zone out there. Please stay here. I'll bring him back right away, I promise.”

“No. I'm not leaving him out there and I won't have you out there alone either. Couldn't I put on one of those nurse uniforms? They didn't shoot the nurses, yeah?” she suggested.

“Fine. We'll both put on medical uniforms and go find him. But you need to stay close to me, please, Rose.”

At her nod, they ran to the wardrobe room and changed into their uniforms, also stopping in the medbay to grab some supplies just in case. The Doctor had set his sonic to scan for Jack at hey followed the little blue light through the dark, currently silent countryside. When they got close to the place where Jack seemed to be, they were met by a small group of soldiers keeping watch. 

“Oh, thank god! We haven't seen any doctors for weeks,” one of them cried.

“What's the problem?” The Doctor asked, urging them to lead him to where he could help.

There was a small group of soldiers that were suffering from infections and such. He was easily able to heal them and instructed that they should rest for another day if possible. While he was helping them, Rose had asked about any of them knowing Jack Harkness.

“The name doesn't sound familiar to me,” the young man told her. His name was Timothy and he had been one of the soldiers that they first met.

“Who's asking?” a familiar voice questioned from the darkness.

“Jack?” Rose gasped, turning to see if it really was her friend.

“Rosie? It can't be!” Jack exclaimed and ran to pick her up in a spinning hug.

“Oh Jack, I'm so glad we found you!” she said.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, pulling her away from the other soldiers so they could speak privately. 

“Looking for you, of course. The Doctor said we couldn't go back to when he left you, and this was the soonest in your timeline that the TARDIS would take us,” she told him, relaying the explanation the Doctor had given her.

“It's been almost fifty years,” he said with tears in his eyes.

“Oh my god, Jack! Can you ever forgive me?” Rose cried, pulling him into a hug.

“You? Rose, he's the one that left me behind,” he argued.

Rose cried as she explained what happened on the Game Station and how they had to leave him behind because the Doctor was regenerating and couldn’t be around him after what she had done. Jack held her hand to help calm her down while he listened and the Doctor joined them just as she was finishing the story.

“I’m sorry, Jack,” the Doctor said, sitting next to Rose and wrapping an arm over her shoulders.

“That’s why I can’t die,” he said.

“I’m so sorry, Jack. You must hate me,” Rose said, sniffling and wiping her face on her sleeve.

“Of course I don’t hate you, Rose. You wanted me alive, that’s not a bad thing. And while I’m upset that I was left behind, I understand, Doctor. We should leave though. I don’t want to change anything important here in Earth’s history, and I think the battles in this area were pivotal in the end of the war,” Jack told them. “Just let me grab a few things.”

The psychic paper showed the senior officers there that Jack had been reassigned and he left with the Doctor and nurse that had come to retrieve him.

Back in the TARDIS, Jack wanted some time to shower and change. War was not clean, warm, or relaxing by any means. And after nearly fifty years spent in Earth’s distant past, he needed some time spent enjoying the TARDIS’ never ending hot water and shower massage. At breakfast the next day, however, they were happy to tell him about the change in their relationship.

“Is this where I get to scream, I told you so?” Jack teased.

“I know, I know. And I deserve far worse. But I had spent centuries worrying about it,” the Doctor said with a sigh.

“Well, all of that is past now. So, where are we going for an adventure today, boys?” Rose asked as she jumped into the Doctor’s lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.

He knew Rose was surprised when he suggested the planet where she and Jack used to go shopping all the time. It had always taken days of the two of them pestering him to go there before, but he had to get this right. He pulled Jack aside while Rose went to get ready.

“I need you to keep her busy for a bit,” the Doctor said.

Jack smirked. “Is there something you need to buy?” he teased knowingly.

“You know perfectly well there is. She might guess too, but that’s not really the point. I have to at least try to go and buy a ring without her. Not that I’m entirely sure how I’m going to go about asking her after all of this.”

“I’ll keep her busy. We’ll get her a nice dress, get her hair and makeup done, and then you can take her out for dinner. Ask her then,” Jack suggested.

“You’re a lifesaver Jack. But what do I say?” he asked.

“You be honest. She knows why you acted that way. You’ve already apologized and moved on from it. You might not need to say much of anything really. She’s been waiting for this,” Jack told him.

It didn’t take the Doctor long to find the perfect ring. He knew that one of the best jewellers in the whole of this galaxy was in the area. He had to stay in the Milky Way or else they wouldn’t consider gold and diamonds to be attractive items for jewellery. After that purchase, he took into consideration what Jack was doing with Rose and went to get his own hair cut and bought a new tuxedo for the evening.

He went back to the TARDIS to make reservations for dinner, then changed into his new clothes and waited for Jack and Rose to get back. They were laughing and talking as the key turned in the lock and they opened the doors.

“Whatever little surprise he has planned, Jack, you know he’ll still be wearing the same suit as always anyway. I don’t see why I had to go to all the… oh,” Rose gasped when she finally saw him leaning against the console.

“You scrub up nice, Doc!” Jack said as he left a gaping Rose by the doors and headed off to the galley to find his own dinner.

“You look beautiful, Rose,” the Doctor told her, finally shaking her from her stare.

“I, oh um, thank you. Where are we going? Jack wouldn’t say,” she wondered.

“Dinner, dancing, everything that you deserve. And no running for our lives tonight. I’ve double and triple checked that nothing happened on this day where we’re heading. So, as long as we land in the right place, we’ll be fine. And I’m checking before we step one foot out of the TARDIS that we are where and when we’re supposed to be,” he told her.

“You know I don’t mind the running for our lives thing,” Rose said.

“And I love that about you. But not today.”

The ship landed easily on the date that he was hoping for and she even parked them right outside of the restaurant where he’d made reservations. He gathered that the TARDIS approved of his plan for the evening given her unusual cooperation.

The Doctor offered his arm when he met her by the doors and escorted Rose out of the ship.

“Reservation for the Doctor,” he told the hostess and they were guided to a secluded table near the back of the restaurant. The Doctor tucked in Rose’s chair before sitting across from her.

The table was lit with a few small candles and the light glittered through the crystal glasses and on the polished silverware, making little flickering points of light dance around the room. Rose smiled at him shyly and glanced around the table looking for a menu.

“I already gave them our order when I made the reservation,” he said and threaded his fingers with hers. “Is this alright? I know we haven’t really done something like this before.”

“Of course it is, Doctor. It’s lovely. I just didn’t expect anything like this,” Rose told him.

“That’s me, unexpected,” he said, making them both laugh.

Dinner was perfect. Rose seemed to thoroughly enjoy the food, making sinful noises as she tasted each new dish brought to the table. And while he was thrilled that she was so impressed, he was becoming more and more nervous. The point of this date was to finally propose to his soulmate, but as the evening wore on, he still couldn’t find the right words or the right moment to ask her. 

Between dinner and dessert, he decided to take Rose out onto the dance floor. There was a small group of musicians playing soft music and just enough room for half a dozen couples to dance. The Doctor held her close and spoke softly into her ear.

“Rose, this is all so long overdue for us,” he began. “I should have been doing things like this since we first met. Instead I’ve spent the last few years making a mess of things.”

“I understand, Doctor. I’ve told you it’s forgiven and I’m happy with how things are between us now,” she assured him.

“I’m happy too, but I’m hoping that you’ll be happy with another change to our relationship,” he said, prompting her to ease back and look up at his face in confusion.

“What else would you possibly want to change?”

“Be my wife, Rose. Please,” he said, watching as her eyes began to fill with tears.

“Really?” she gasped.

“Of course, Rose. Please, please say you’ll marry me,” he insisted and knelt on the floor in front of her, pulling the small ring box from his pocket.

“Oh my god! It’s beautiful, Doctor. Yes, of course I’ll marry you,” she replied, moving into his arms where he knelt so he could hug her around her waist.

The whole room filled with applause and cheers, breaking them both from their illusion of privacy. Rose blushed as he slipped the ring onto her finger and led her back to their table for dessert.

They talked a little about wedding plans while they finished their meal, but that was all left behind when they returned to the TARDIS. As soon as the doors were closed, the Doctor scooped her up in his arms and carried her off towards his bedroom. He considered it their room now, but they hadn’t moved any of her things yet, so that was only in his mind thus far.

Rose giggled and insisted that she could walk on her own, but he silenced her with kisses and nibbling on her ears as he made his way through the winding hallways. He kicked the door shut behind him and finally set her on her feet as he kissed her deeply and felt along her side for the zipper to her dress.

They both moaned when his cool fingers finally ghosted along her bare skin. He found that she hadn’t worn a bra due to the cut of her dress and upon further exploration, discovered that she had also not been wearing any knickers all evening.

“Oh Rose,” he sighed, caressing her backside as her dress slid down to the floor.

She hummed happily, wrapping her arms around his neck and allowing him to pull her naked body against his fully clothed one. He knew he would need to remedy that difference in short order as he planned to bury himself inside his fiancée as soon as possible. Rose seemed to feel the same since she was now working on unfastening the buttons of his shirt.

He tugged his bowtie off and tossed it aside, hurriedly pulling off his jacket as well. Rose had finished with his shirt buttons by that point and he clumsily wrestled with his shoes before she got her hands onto his trousers. Smirking at his sudden urgency to be just as naked as her, she stepped gracefully out of her shoes and moved to wait for him on the bed.

The Doctor froze then, trousers undone and only one shoe off, and stared at the sight of Rose lying bare on his bed. He had dreamt of this for centuries and now was the moment. Their intimacy the day before had been hurried and intense, but they’d both fallen asleep in each other’s arms without having taken this last step. 

“You gonna join me, Doctor, or just stare all night?” Rose asked.

He quickly finished stripping off the last of his clothing at that and crawled onto the bed next to her, connecting their lips once again. Hands roamed over bare skin and Rose sighed when his kisses moved to her neck where he could take in the lovely scent of pure Rose Tyler.

Clearly, she had been waiting for this all evening because as soon as she turned to climb over him, he could feel that she was already wet, grinding herself against his erection. He groaned into her shoulder and took hold of her hips, trying to slow her movements so he wouldn’t finish too quickly. The Doctor wanted this to be perfect, even if their mutual inexperience meant that it would likely be brief. 

Rose reached between them to guide him into her and they both gasped at the sensation of finally joining this way. They settled together, both pressing tighter against the other and just holding themselves as close to their soulmate as they could possibly be. When their breathing settled, he looked into her eyes and helped to guide her hips as she started to move over him. He tried to thrust into her from below but ultimately found that he needed better leverage. Pulling her tightly against him again, he rolled them over and urged her to wrap her legs around his hips.

The Doctor watched as her breasts moved with every thrust and she closed her eyes, moaning at the new feelings this angle provided. He held his weight off of her, but leaned in enough to take one nipple into his mouth and sucked on it roughly while he continued to drive into her. Rose grasped his hair to hold him in place and he groaned at the sensation of her fingers scraping his scalp. It was only a few minutes later that they both collapsed, trembling from their orgasms and curing around each other. He was sure there would likely be a second and third round before they left the room again, but for the moment, they basked in the afterglow of finally having come this far.


	8. Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't want to wait until tomorrow morning to post this, so it's going up now. This is the end of this little fic. When I first had the idea I was terrified that it was too big a rewrite and would take me forever. But skimming over the stuff that stayed essentially the same was the best thing I could have done. If I had been rewriting every episode, it would have driven me crazy and I'd never have finished it because rewrites that are that detailed always end up horribly boring for me. I hope you like the way I tied this all up and I hope it isn't too confusing. The incredible TheDoctorMulder read it all over for me despite having like zero spare time right now, but there might still be a few errors since it was more of a read-through to tell me if it sucks, than a proper edit. Thank you for all the lovely comments on this story, I really appreciate it.

The Doctor happily piloted the TARDIS towards their destination, just down the street from the flat of Jackie Tyler. There was a time when he dreaded these visits, but given Rose’s extended lifespan, she made sure that much more time passed for them than her mother now. She wanted to have as much time with Jackie as possible before time took her away from them.

He remembered the day, so long ago now, when they had arrived to tell Jackie that they were getting married. They had turned up on her doorstep, with Jack in tow, and informed her that she needed to come with them on a little trip. They’d whisked her away to planet Fiji in the 34th century to get married with Jackie and Jack as their witnesses, then enjoyed two weeks of relaxing and honeymooning before bringing Jackie back home. It had been a bit of a shock for his mother-in-law, but she accepted it. Especially after seeing the luxurious room and unlimited credit stick they’d given her for the trip.

This trip was to show Jackie her newest great grandchild. The Doctor and Rose’s oldest son had three children now, and the latest addition was named Jacqueline, after her great grandmother.

“Hello, grandfather. Can I help you?” Arkytior asked as she skipped happily into the console room.

“No, thank you, Susan. We’re almost there,” he replied with a smile.

“I still don’t understand why you call me that. No one else calls me by my middle name, grandfather. And I would think you’d be happy that I was given a Gallifreyan name,” she told him.

“I love you very much, Arkytior. And I love your name as well, but there are two reasons why I call you Susan. The first is that I can’t help but associate the name Arkytior with Rose, I sometimes even call my wife that name in my head when I’m thinking in Gallifreyan rather than English. The second is that you’ve been Susan to me since I was about 400 years old,” he explained.

“But grandfather, you’re well over a thousand now and I’m only in my twenties. That doesn’t make any sense,” she argued.

“It’s time I told you, since we’ll have to complete the circular paradox soon,” he said with a sigh. “I met you, looking very much as you do now, during my first incarnation on Gallifrey. It was you, Susan, who helped me find the TARDIS and run away to this life we all love so much.”

“But how can that be, grandfather? There’s no way back to Gallifrey now. You’ve told us that even before it was destroyed in the war, the Time Lords couldn’t travel outside of their proper time stream on Gallifrey without the High Council knowing about it.”

“True. And with the Time Lock created during the war, it should be impossible. But, knowing that I had to find a way to complete this circle, I’ve been looking for a solution from the day you were born. I’ve found some technology that will allow us to carefully control a time storm. They’re usually quite unpredictable, but it’s that chaotic nature that will allow it to break through all of the locks and controls set up around Gallifrey and get you to where you need to be. I was withering away on Gallifrey, my dear. I knew that my soulmate had to be human, but I was stuck there, never earning the privilege of piloting my own TT Capsule. Then you came along and dragged me off to find our lovely Old Girl and we ran together through space and time,” he told her.

“But I have too much knowledge about your future, grandfather. How could I possibly travel with you for any length of time without giving away too much?” she wondered.

“You’ll have to tell me a few things, but for the most part, just focus on the moment. I trust your judgment, you are brilliant afterall. And really, the fact that you’re even worried about these things is enough reassurance that you understand the risks involved in saying too much.”

“How long will I be away?” she questioned.

“For you, it was several years. For those of us on this side, we’ll be waiting for your call. You’ll have your mobile, and we’ll come pick you up as soon as you’re ready,” he assured her.

“Years? I’ll miss everyone so much, but if this is a circular paradox, it would be catastrophic if I don’t go,” she said sadly.

“I’m so sorry, Susan. I’m sorry to have to put this burden on you, but it was you that made all of this possible. It was you that started me on my way and your reassurances that helped me get through all of the hard times along the way. Because of you, I knew that I would one day find Rose and it would all be worth the struggles. You’ll come across a few younger versions of me even after you’re back with all of us. And I’m quite sure that this will also help you find the young man whose words are written on your arm,” he said with a nod to the spot she always kept covered.

Susan’s eyes widened. “But you-”

“I don’t know what it says. It’s not my place, but I’ve noticed enough to know that you have a soulmark too.”

“You aren’t giving away too much knowledge of my future are you, grandfather?” she teased.

“Well, after all the times that you assured me that I would indeed find my lovely wife and start our fantastic life together, it’s only fair to give you a bit of incentive based on what I know as well,” he replied with a wink.

“Then I suppose I had better make the most of this visit with great gran and the rest of the family before I go,” she sighed.

“Absolutely. Now, I’m just going to finish landing the TARDIS. Would you mind letting everyone else know that it’s time to show off little Jackie to Gran Jackie?” he requested as he moved to start flicking the required switches and levers.

“Of course, grandfather. And thank you.” 

“No, thank you, Arkytior.”


End file.
